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What Bulimic thoughts are you having right now?


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#9621 taco_and_420

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Posted 14 January 2017 - 07:53 PM

I am going on a ski trip next week. Staying in a hotel room alone. Was worried I'd fall into a bp hole and it would get in the way of ski

Then i realized all the restaurants are so expensive I won't be doing any bp. Just drinking.


Also worried about coming home and freaking out over the number on the scale. Being at elevation leaves you bloated. Already worried about what I will weigjt after vacation and I haven't even left let!!!

Hoping I can hook up with some mountain men..get them to buy me food/drinks

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HW 267 size 24

LW 138 size 4

SW (this time) Size 18 too scared to weigh!

CW 154

GW 125


#9622 iwillbe.thin

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Posted 14 January 2017 - 07:58 PM

that I just had a good sized B/P about an hour ago but now I'm hungry again and want to stuff my face with cookies and cereal but if I do that I'll have to purge again and I really don't want to right now but I'm probably going to end up doing it anyway ugh yeah I'm going to go get the cereal


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5'7" of nothing but fat

 


#9623 Skyhigh.dreamer

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Posted 14 January 2017 - 07:59 PM

Work has been so slow since i work retail and its after Christmas
I haven't had a days work in weeks
Im running out of money
And I still spend it all on b/p food
Im a responsible adult!


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To be tiny enough to dance on a butterflies wing...

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GW: 97lbs


#9624 Across an ocean of dreams

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Posted 14 January 2017 - 08:32 PM

I'm about to destroy these cinnamon rolls!!!! ...then hate myself then purge then forget how much I hated myself for doing that and then go repeat it until I pass out..

#9625 MindreAna

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Posted 14 January 2017 - 08:58 PM

we were supposed to go to a party but he didn't wake me up from my nap and now I just hope he leaves without trying to get me to come with because then I get the place to myself. I could order food and he wouldn't see how much. I already purged twice today but I'm Ready. If he doesn't say anything I also get to be mad at him which justifies the binge. Logic at its best.

#9626 second best

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Posted 14 January 2017 - 09:26 PM

Fuck this water retention.

#9627 rutten

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Posted 14 January 2017 - 09:29 PM

I'm thinking of all of the food I've thrown up today and wishing I had it in front of me now so I can taste it again


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Sameee dude

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#9628 takinguptoomucheverything

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Posted 18 January 2017 - 09:56 AM

that pastas just waiting for you, rise up, and take this oppurtunity youve been afforded, but also fucking dont because theres no way youll get away with it


good luck, it gets better and i hope you had a great day


#9629 Roo-barb

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Posted 18 January 2017 - 09:57 AM

I just spent my rent money on food.
images_2.jpg
HW 137LB
LW 75LB ♡
116LB
114.5LB
CW 110LB
UGW 75LB

#9630 vitele

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Posted 18 January 2017 - 10:30 AM

I WANT TO BINGE!! but I'm IP, so I have to wait for at least half an hour for my dad to pick me up and drive me home for the evening (I'm IP for depression/suicide attempt, so I'm allowed to go home on occasion to get me used to eventually going back permanently). So yeah, already know that I'll end up b/p-ing, and I also haven't been able to weigh myself since this weekend, so I'm kinda scared what the scale will say.



#9631 bailesj

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Posted 18 January 2017 - 02:10 PM

My grandma called me out my grandma called me out oh god she knows shots fired yo shots fired

My mum did the same to me at the weekend. What did you say?

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CW - 145lb
GW1 - 168lb :)

GW3 - 139lb - :D
GW2 - 153lb :)GW4 - 126lb
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#9632 Zombi

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Posted 18 January 2017 - 04:53 PM

If we get this place...
I'm scared the kitchen will be constantly empty because I'd have eaten it all.
I'm scared my partner will realise just how bad it is.
I won't have my purging spot in the garden anymore, but we might have a shed so maybe I can do it in there
Depending on how close the bathroom is to my daughters bedroom she might hear me
I can bp in peace when partner is out
I can't spend so much money on takeaways anymore

I.. really need this place though.

Look into her eyes- what do you see? The truth she hides, the constant fatigue~


SW; 154 28.1
HW; 161 29.4

CW; 112.4 20.3
GW; 110 19.7


════»UGW; 95lbs 16.6«════


#9633 floatinganchors

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Posted Yesterday, 09:25 AM

My mum did the same to me at the weekend. What did you say?

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All i managed to sputter out was "what? Ew no thats gross. No, no...no" and then paid really close attention to drinking my water..
I know it didnt fool her but she let it go.
And now shes offering me so much junk food. Everytime were near food. Aparently shes cool with it.
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#9634 guitar

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Posted Yesterday, 09:34 AM

the wheels are in motion to have me go to inpatient treatment for this stupid shit...

 

i'm thinking i'd really rather just try as hard as i can to stop B/Ping and go back to high restriction...

 

but if i could do that, i wouldn't be in a position to need treatment? idk



#9635 kaaskt

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Posted Yesterday, 10:22 AM

can't wait to purge this Chinese food, and that frosty i had at 8am...yes...then go to the gym later...hope i don't die..or, hope i do....doesn't matter either way.



#9636 MsYesterday

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Posted Today, 01:39 AM

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Trying to recover, maybe (?)

Used to restrict but puke game got too strong.

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cw: 94lbs

 

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#9637 ASTORIAN

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Posted Today, 03:04 AM

I can purge hands free now. Freaks me out.

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#9638 MindreAna

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Posted Today, 03:25 AM

How quickly will this nausea pass so I can binge? Why am not happy that I'm nauseous since it's preventing me from eating? Am I gonna make it through the night without binging? If I binge will I manage to not fall asleep after but make sure I purge first? How many laxatives should I take after my next binge considering how bad I'm feeling already? Was that pain earlier acid reflux or heart pain? I'm so happy it feels like my motivation is coming back. How skinny could I be in a month? Why am I so bloated? If a person can have an enormously stretched stomach from the sheer capacity they binge, can your intestines be stretched to hold an abnormally large quantity of feces/water too? Is the amount I expel after taking laxatives normal? Does my diarrhoea look like other bulimica diarrhoea? If there's a thread for binge hauls should there be a thread for what your shit looks like after laxatives? Why am I so fucking weird? Go to sleep.

#9639 cyberskinny

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Posted Today, 05:25 AM

i want my ability to purge everything i had in my stomach back


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#9640 Cheese

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Posted Today, 05:49 AM

right now i specifically really, really want to binge on muenster cheese. just straight up whole blocks of cheese. god i'm gross.

my chest has been really achy ever since i purged yesterday afternoon and at one point i was starting to have pain creep up my left arm and i had a mini panic attack thinking that my heart was about to give out. i just wanna sleep, body, pls.

angel food cake is pretty good? the flavor is so delicate and barely there but wow it's good.

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20

5'1, not short. just... fun-sized.

HW: 130
LW: 81

CW: 84.6 // 16.0 BMI

 

The woods are lovely, dark and deep, but I have promises to keep, and miles to go before I sleep.

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