18th Feb, 7:45pm
whoa, what a week.
Had my heart procedure on Friday which quite honestly was painful and pretty traumatic, but they found the problems at least.
Today I saw my cardiologist for a follow up of the procedure and I'm booked in to get it my heart fixed under general anaesthetic in April.
In between today and that procedure, I see another cardiologist for the POTS side of things.
Basically my heart is a dick.
Which brings me to the last few days.
I'd been having pretty strong chest pain after the procedure that wasn't going away, and between that and the fasting I was feeling really unwell, my body had just had enough, and I reluctantly went to the hospital.
When I got to emergency they did an echo of my heart and found that I had a pericardial effusion, which is too much fluid surrounding the heart that shouldn't be there.
A visit to Emergency, a hospital transfer, a cardiology ward stay, a battery of tests and three echos later I'm home. The effusion is still there but hopefully it will get better on its own.
The only thing that was good about being in hospital - it was so much easier to fast.
However constant low blood sugar readings were rife and they kept giving me bags of glucose which scared the absolute shit out of me. My systolic blood pressure last night was apparently in the 80s-90s, and I remember being in and out of it and they were considering calling a MET call but I'm so glad they didn't.
So without eating anything, I came home from the hospital 2kg heavier than when I went in, which makes absolutely no sense and I want to cry. I can't believe I gained that much without eating, it just doesn't compute.
Today I've had 686 calories. I feel like a round fat fuck.
I started two new cardiac drugs after the procedure so I don't know if it's weight from that? Is it water retention or am I just an indulgent cow? How many calories were even IN the glucose infusions?
I'm stressed out.
I'm far too heavy. My stomach and thighs are revolting.
I'm not allowed to exercise for two weeks or lift anything heavy.
I'm going to get so fucking big.
This is not okay.