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PixieFlies' Dieting Blog


Day 8 - Tired

Posted by PixieFlies , 19 October 2020 · 9 views

Had a terrible nights sleep and a mini binge late last night. I'm not really coping with today. I feel guilty but I just wanted to eat. Mini Binge - 420 cal
Chocolate - 90 cal
Butter Chicken w/ Rice - 550
I got tired and stopped counting calories so I could just eat...
Total - ??? cal


Day 7 - No Energy to Fight

Posted by PixieFlies , 19 October 2020 · 45 views

Today I have no energy to fight my eating disorder, or to try and keep ahold of it. If it hadn't have been for my housemate today checking to make sure I eat then I probably wouldn't have. She had to do some bargining and somethings she watched me like a hawk on. She did put me in a nightmare situation today though. She made me go on a walk with her and o...


Day 6 - Planned Binge Day

Posted by PixieFlies , 18 October 2020 · 54 views

I decided to let loose a little and not count calories today, don't know how much I've eaten but I'm sure it's a little over 2000 calories. I'm stuck somewhere between giving into the voices in my head that make me restrict and trying not to relapse too far. I spent today mostly in bed to recover from the extreme trigger yesterday. Apparently minced meat...


Day 5 - I hate myself

Posted by PixieFlies , 17 October 2020 · 83 views

Despite having hardly eaten all morning I have this insatiable urge to purge up just coffee alone. I went with my friends to the shopping centre and he was insistent that about getting his girlfriend some more stylish clothes to show off her figure and it really triggered and upset me to want to purge even more. If someone hadn't given me some food I woul...


Day 4 - Exhaustion

Posted by PixieFlies , 16 October 2020 · 91 views

I got up and went to see my friends today and help them babysit their niece and nephew. After 5 hours of running after kids I'm exhausted. I came also to help clean a tank and prep it to be given to another one of their friends who needs a turtle tank. Being around their family and essentially being part of their family my food intake is watched. My frien...


Day 3 - Determination

Posted by PixieFlies , 14 October 2020 · 69 views

Had a chat last night with a close friend who used to and probably still to some degree does have AN. While she is concerned that I am relapsing she gave me some advice. Peanut butter covers the majority of your macros and take a multi vitamin preferably gummy because... yummy. Anyways I'm going to sit down for another Netflix and Starve session today. St...


Day 2 - Guilt shame and whatever

Posted by PixieFlies , 14 October 2020 · 60 views

I had a binge last night on a donut last night just after midnight. Went to bed happy for a moment... woke up feeling guilt and shame for eating a donut. Donut - 350 cal
Digestive - 72 cal
Vegetarian curry - 200 cal
Sushi rolls x 3 - 600 cal Total - 1222 All in all not a bad day. I'm still getting used to restricting again. Somehow I am alr...


Day 1 - Let the restrictions begin

Posted by PixieFlies , 13 October 2020 · 66 views

My sugar date cancelled on me this morning... annoying. So I slept in until noon, and ate two digestive biscuits and a coffee with milk for breakfast. My mindset is back on starve mode after binge eating. I probably should drink some water to get rid of this headache. Housemate cooked dinner tonight, and I stayed for that instead of going to a friends hou...


Starting back again

Posted by PixieFlies , 12 October 2020 · 56 views

Guess it's time to start cutting back again, with my body dysmorphia out of control. Well let's make it simple... I'm going to give up soft drinks and energy drinks. That sugary crap does nothing but add to my misery and my weight gain so time to stop. Guess I should run a counter down below that I can update periodically. Just going to have to get my caf...

October 2020

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