April 10th 2021
I stayed over at his house last night and it felt like pure magic. I dont usually fall this fast but hes so special. We watched a doccumentary and ended up making out through most of it......and the rest of the night but no sex. Im a bit frigid but hes so cuddly and theres just something about him. I accidentally heard him say to his dad "I really like her but". So i assumed he was talking to another girl cos to be fair, were not a couple yet. Today he has been a little distant. I thought the worse but he just messaged me telling me hes really struggling with mental health. I said im there for him whatever it is but i dont know how to help a person with depression. I know you cant just cheer them up but i really like him and i would say the L word but that sounds crazy at this point in time. Why does mental health issues have to be a thing? I wish i likes the way i looked and didnt have to slowly kill myself to NOT EVEN BE HAPPIER. This hurts so much and its hard to breathe now. Im so so lonely and have nobody. I just want the white picket fence life but the tattooed version obviously.