LEMON’s May Blog - Forums and Community

Jump to content

About MPA

MPA is a site dedicated to the support or recovery of those suffering from eating disorders or body dysmorphic disorders. Please be sensitive to this fact when creating an account and contributing to the board.

LEMON’s May Blog


MAY 11

Posted by lemonduck , 11 May 2021 · 43 views

I'd normally fast or eat as little as possible after bad b/p days because I'm paranoid about not purging the all the binge back up but I decided to go back to roughly 1000 calories a day to minimise the binge urges. I've been stressed from work lately and I really don't wish to deal with unnecessary weight gain.
>grilled chicken breast...


MAY 10

Posted by lemonduck , 09 May 2021 · 31 views

I ended up b/ping today as well lmao. I used yesterday as an excuse to b/p again because I had “already ruined this month”. Unfortunately I’m going to have the house to myself until the evening on Mon, Tues and Thurs from now on because my mother is going to work again. Being alone triggers me to b/p much like it did today,, I might eat close to my...


MAY 09

Posted by lemonduck , 09 May 2021 · 36 views

I had to get lunch AND DINNER with the entire family today and it made me anxious about my intake for the entire day;;; so my brain was screaming /@-/aHa LeT's BiNgE aNd PuRgE 1!!11!!/[email protected]/ so I lost control and purged four times today. My jaws are in pain I don't think I got much up from my final session. I really wanted May to be b/p free but here...


MAY 08

Posted by lemonduck , 07 May 2021 · 39 views

I decided to make a simple mug cake for my mother but she didn't like it which made me upset [s]for the entire day ...( ;~; ) I'm a full grown adult, why do I let things like this get to me. I'm actually uncomfortably full and bloated as of tonight but I will really push myself to eat near 900 calories for the next six-ish days.


MAY 07

Posted by lemonduck , 07 May 2021 · 53 views

Had to get blood work done today and I felt so faint and weak afterwards I tried not to show it so I could leave without them wanting to do any more tests etc. I felt like absolute crap for some reason today and couldn't get myself to eat anymore, I didn't even want to eat dinner but my parents insisted I did because I looked pale. [Today]...


MAY 06

Posted by lemonduck , 05 May 2021 · 19 views

It was freezing today,, I am glad I only needed to leave the house for errands/groceries. I bought some rolled oat and I honestly missed the thick consistency of them so much nsdjsjsj (>W<). I was actually planning to eat more but my lower abdomen is in pain so I'm not going to push myself to eat more and go to bed early as I have to see th...


MAY 05

Posted by lemonduck , 04 May 2021 · 27 views

My fitbit arrived today and I am already having second thoughts on it... It was initially to make sure I could "see" my tdee therefore encourage me to eat more but now it's making me obsessed with my step count [s]again which at one point I made sure I would hit 17k steps daily and that was not a good period of my life so uMMn. My work shifts for...


MAY 04

Posted by lemonduck , 03 May 2021 · 14 views

I am absolutely exhausted from work and it’s been raining all day here so I really couldn’t be bothered to go grocery shopping,, (yis lame excuse I know). It also seems that I am struggling to surpass the 800kcal mark for some reason huh¿ I can't believe it's only Tuesday, I just want this week to be over already,, P L E A S E. [Today]...


MAY 03

Posted by lemonduck , 03 May 2021 · 34 views

21:16– [s]/sigh/ ,, I couldn't get myself to eat any more today so I am immensely frustrated and disappointed. Might need to go buy calorie dense foods such as dried fruit or nuts to increase my intake. [Today]
>homemade soup: 303
>cabbage kimchi: 16  >tuna and egg burger: 360
>cheese: 70
>seaweed salad: 40  =...


MAY 02

Posted by lemonduck , 02 May 2021 · 50 views

21:08– It’s only the second day of my 1000kcal goal a day this month and I am already struggling to eat more because being “full” triggers my b/p urges. I had to force myself to finish the apple pie because it felt like I had eaten too much when in reality I hadn’t ... Why can’t I just be normal ,, [sigh] [Today]
>potato salad: 283


MAY 01

Posted by lemonduck , 01 May 2021 · 61 views

20:14– A personal blog to help me not cheat and keep track/accountability of my new high restriction regime for this month (and possibly longer) as I cannot get myself out of a b/p cycle whether it be by purging or over exercising and it’s interfering with a lot of aspects of my life. I will try to stay below 1000kcal per day so it will be a total of...

June 2021

13 14 1516171819

Recent Entries

Recent Comments

  • Photo
    MAY 11
    Chihiro123 - May 11 2021 07:32 PM
  • Photo
    MAY 05
    Chihiro123 - May 09 2021 07:54 PM
  • Photo
    MAY 09
    Chihiro123 - May 09 2021 07:48 PM
  • Photo
    MAY 02
    lemonduck - May 02 2021 07:23 PM
  • Photo
    MAY 02
    Chihiro123 - May 02 2021 02:09 PM