Obviously back in the day- the size 0 trend sort of endorsed 'Clenbuterol'- however the horse comments made me equate it with Ketamin, which I wouldn't touch in my right mind- and I was also too young and poor to get hold of it.
Now, there is a thyroid stimulating drug on the market called T3- or 'Cytomel'- which is meant to burn straight through fat AND muscle- side effects being the obvious, palpitations, sweating, shaking etc.
It's not that expensive to get hold of because of distributors and legality in Mexico- and honestly, I bought some online the other day in my 'desperate' phase- and after sleeping on it, woke up and cancelled it- for two reasons
A) Though it's popular among body builders- it seems to represent the same problems as an anabolic steroid- and literally, I didn't know what it would do to ME as a person
and I went from 140 to 105 pounds when I first- not developed by eating disorder, I'd always had issues surrounding food- but moving to University concentrated them and I literally lost about two stone in a month and a half. Mila Kunis said that after she started eating normally again after slimming for Black Swan- her fat relocated to different areas- and I'm scared that if I lose weight in such a fashion, by something that had no regard for whether it was burning fat or muscle- it would change my body shape altogether- for example I'd lose everything from my boobs (no problem, really, as I can't stand them anyway) but absolutely NOTHING from my hips, leaving me disgustingly out of proportion.
After gaining back 15 pounds after seeing some element of "recover"- I'm now, naturally, disgusted with myself, can't believe I let it come this far- and am having this thoughts about diet pills- looking for quick fixes. I've also become more dependent on laxatives in a very short space of time- probably because I'm desperate to at least get to the weight I was to even look remotely skinny.
Has anybody had any similar thoughts- any experience with cytomel (T3)- or advice on kickstarting weight loss? I'm at the biggest plateu of my life and though I don't want to resort to EXTREME measures, I fear I will if I continue to see no progress (I'm eating 230 calories a day, doing the shred, only consuming black coffee or diet coke, running every two days- and I've been bouncing on the 120-117 mark for about three weeks- which is the highest I've been in so long and I cannot seem to shake it. I've had blood tests recently, so it's nothing to do with my thyroid as I suspected. Any advice at all.