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xaesthetic's ramblings and whatnot

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#61 xaesthetic

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Posted 02 September 2014 - 01:11 AM


My new phone has an auto-scroll feature that works with where your eyes are on the screen...

That's fucking creepy man

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#62 xaesthetic

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Posted 02 September 2014 - 01:12 AM


My scabs itch something fierce


#63 xaesthetic

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Posted 02 September 2014 - 01:30 AM


My boyfriend just had me order protein shakes that are 2500 calories and 184 g of protein per serving

Is this even legal?

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#64 xaesthetic

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Posted 09 September 2014 - 12:00 AM

Would a fly without wings be called a "Walk"?



#65 xaesthetic

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Posted 09 September 2014 - 12:01 AM

If a deaf child is caught cursing, do the parents wash his hands out with soap?



#66 xaesthetic

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Posted 09 September 2014 - 12:02 AM

Why is it called Alcoholics Anonymous?

 

The first thing you do is state your name and that you are an alcoholic.


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#67 xaesthetic

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Posted 09 September 2014 - 12:03 AM

Why do we drive on the parkway and park in the driveway?



#68 xaesthetic

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Posted 09 September 2014 - 12:05 AM

On a children's superman costume: 

 

"Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."


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#69 xaesthetic

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Posted 09 September 2014 - 12:07 AM

Why does the sun lighten my hair but darken my skin?



#70 xaesthetic

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Posted 09 September 2014 - 12:07 AM

Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?



#71 xaesthetic

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Posted 09 September 2014 - 12:08 AM

It makes me uneasy that doctors call what they do "practice"...



#72 xaesthetic

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Posted 09 September 2014 - 12:09 AM

Does the wool on a sheep shrink when it rains?



#73 xaesthetic

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Posted 09 September 2014 - 12:10 AM

Congress is the opposite of Progress.



#74 xaesthetic

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Posted 09 September 2014 - 12:11 AM

How come my dish soap is made with real lemons but my lemon juice is artificially flavored?



#75 xaesthetic

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Posted 09 September 2014 - 12:15 AM

Only in America...

 

...pizza gets to your door faster than emergency transport.

...there are handicap spots in front of a skating rink.

...drive in atms have braille lettering.



#76 xaesthetic

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Posted 09 September 2014 - 12:19 AM

1,111,111 x 1,111,111 = 1234567654321



#77 Guest_Push Push_*

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Posted 09 September 2014 - 12:20 AM

I want to marry this thread
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#78 xaesthetic

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Posted 09 September 2014 - 12:23 AM

Are bonsai kittens real... cause thats fucked up



#79 BigMamaBE

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Posted 10 September 2014 - 07:31 AM

this gif describes how I feel every time I talk to an attractive person.

tumblr_n2xbloCxfZ1sgl0ajo1_500.gif

 

also... rocky horror picture show is the greatest of all time.

 

if you haven't seen it live, do so. Don't be afraid of the devirginization process... you'll survive.

 

 

 

LOVE ME SOME FRANK-N-FURTER!!!!! SQUEEEEEE!

 

P.S. THIS!


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Queen of {{HUGS}}, Goddess of Grammar, Linguistic Lyricist

Food is not the boss, I am!

 

I like to save my old signatures in the spoiler, just in case I might want to reuse the gifs, etc. And I like to put really huge pics in my signature.

So consider yourself forewarned.

 
Spoiler

 

 

 

 

 

HALLOWEEN: UNIVERSE APPROVED

1518941_784758511583898_8269077515798693

Spoiler

 

Currently in the Through The Looking Glass Challenge - Team Red Queen!! I'll be posting my MFP screenshots in my BotB thread.

Read about my disordered escapades in BigMama's Battle of the Bulge

 

red_queen_by_vavalika-d6m0zgi.jpg

red_queen_by_westfear-d4ki42x.jpg

552454371_1030923.gif?4

Red-Queen-ouat-in-wonderland-35853602-24

 

 

The Attic is a Lie!!!!!!!


#80 Fatcatmum1

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Posted 10 September 2014 - 07:34 AM

I love beer. It's so tasty. I haven't eaten anything though. I probably should...


Well I only drink wine now, so 5 glasses = 5 portions of fruit a day, as it's grapes!
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