185 replies to this topic

[Alice In Wonderland]

I honestly wish someone would have been and rude to me before I started this whole thing. It would saved me so much pain and turmoil. If someone would have be brave enough to offend me and tell me to go away... I wouldn't be where I am today. 

I agree with this. I don't want to help people who come on here who don't have an eating disorder, I don't want to help them get one. So I'd rather send them to MFP whereby they can lose it healthily. No one deserves this shit if they can avoid it.

[prescription]

I agree with this. I don't want to help people who come on here who don't have an eating disorder, I don't want to help them get one. So I'd rather send them to MFP whereby they can lose it healthily. No one deserves this shit if they can avoid it.

 

I feel like everyone is so concerned about hurting feelings that we tend forget that there are actual lives behind the screens. Some of the people that come here are as young as 12 and 13 asking for tips to become anorexic. These kids don't have the life experience required to make an informed decision. They aren't even allowed to miss a day of school without a parents permission yet they come here to learn how to ruin their life. 

[AmyPond]

I honestly wish someone would have been and rude to me before I started this whole thing. It would saved me so much pain and turmoil. If someone would have be brave enough to offend me and tell me to go away... I wouldn't be where I am today. 

 

Yea, I get that.

[Alice In Wonderland]

I feel like everyone is so concerned about hurting feelings that we tend forget that there are actual lives behind the screens. Some of the people that come here are as young as 12 and 13 asking for tips to become anorexic. These kids don't have the life experience required to make an informed decision. They aren't even allowed to miss a day of school without a parents permission yet they come here to learn how to ruin their life. 

Exactly. I couldn't bear to have the thought that I contributed towards a young child developing an eating disorder because I welcomed them into a site like this. Could you imagine?

So the ones who come on and are clearly fitting the above criteria, I have no time for. Also, the people who come from SIS, and preach about the Goddess Ana or that whole Butterfly 'let me be your mentor'. I don't have time for them. But anyone else, I'm all for welcoming.

[prescription]

Exactly. I couldn't bear to have the thought that I contributed towards a young child developing an eating disorder because I welcomed them into a site like this. Could you imagine?

So the ones who come on and are clearly fitting the above criteria, I have no time for. Also, the people who come from SIS, and preach about the Goddess Ana or that whole Butterfly 'let me be your mentor'. I don't have time for them. But anyone else, I'm all for welcoming.

 

There is a lot of responsibility that goes with giving tips and helping people find way to become anorexic. While the site admin and mods can not be legally held responsible individual users can be. I think a lot of the teenagers and younger kids don't understand the ramifications of giving tips or helping other "get an ED". It's not that they are stupid or refuse to listen, it's that they don't have experience to help them understand it. 

 

If I was to tell someone that fasting for X amount time will help them drop the last few pounds and they then took my advice I can be held  for what happens to them. Say that person then drives to the store for milk and passes out at the wheel striking another car and killing a mother an her three kids. Guess what? I can now be held for 4 counts of involuntary manslaughter (in my state). Even if you live in a state where this is not the law, I would hope you wouldn't want to live with that everyday.

[Alice In Wonderland]

Don't be mean to each other guys, we got enough shit to deal with, without getting at each other

[prescription]

So you really think, without taking in to account how you now know you feel about it now that if someone had been rude to you that you would have then just thought. 

"Oh, yeah that was mean/rude and made me feel bad/sad, I should probably just stop trying to lose weight and pick up nitting, that seems like a good hobby but none of this nonsense for me" ??? 

My guess it that reaction is rare if even it exists, more they just feel rejected and even worse and when someone feels like that it always ends up fine right? Just push people away and they will learn that they are wrong and you are right?

Also what you might feel and think doesn't change the fact that this site has a purpose other than your agenda, people come here for all reasons, newcomers might also have difficulty talking about how they really feel, making it seem light and funny is a way of coping for many so what you see as brave might not be for others. If being a jerk, being rude or judgmental is the same as being brave in your book then... I'm at a loss for words, really. 

And also with that attitude why don't you just stop being like you are, if you're not happy, why are you here? If someone questions your motives or reasons, belittles you and so on, you just think "oh, what a brave person" ?? 

I think you are missing the point of the statement. Also, why are you attacking me? There is no reason to be hateful because I have different view point than you do. We can disagree and still respect each other. 

[BridgeteCara]

I think you are missing the point of the statement. Also, why are you attacking me? There is no reason to be hateful because I have different view point than you do. We can disagree and still respect each other.

^^^^ yeah. Seriously what the fuck.

[BridgeteCara]

So you really think, without taking in to account how you now know you feel about it now that if someone had been rude to you that you would have then just thought.

"Oh, yeah that was mean/rude and made me feel bad/sad, I should probably just stop trying to lose weight and pick up nitting, that seems like a good hobby but none of this nonsense for me" ???

My guess it that reaction is rare if even it exists, more they just feel rejected and even worse and when someone feels like that it always ends up fine right? Just push people away and they will learn that they are wrong and you are right?

Also what you might feel and think doesn't change the fact that this site has a purpose other than your agenda, people come here for all reasons, newcomers might also have difficulty talking about how they really feel, making it seem light and funny is a way of coping for many so what you see as brave might not be for others. If being a jerk, being rude or judgmental is the same as being brave in your book then... I'm at a loss for words, really.

And also with that attitude why don't you just stop being like you are, if you're not happy, why are you here? If someone questions your motives or reasons, belittles you and so on, you just think "oh, what a brave person" ??

Dude your a jerk.

[prescription]

So you really think, without taking in to account how you now know you feel about it now that if someone had been rude to you that you would have then just thought. 

"Oh, yeah that was mean/rude and made me feel bad/sad, I should probably just stop trying to lose weight and pick up nitting, that seems like a good hobby but none of this nonsense for me" ??? 

My guess it that reaction is rare if even it exists, more they just feel rejected and even worse and when someone feels like that it always ends up fine right? Just push people away and they will learn that they are wrong and you are right?

Also what you might feel and think doesn't change the fact that this site has a purpose other than your agenda, people come here for all reasons, newcomers might also have difficulty talking about how they really feel, making it seem light and funny is a way of coping for many so what you see as brave might not be for others. If being a jerk, being rude or judgmental is the same as being brave in your book then... I'm at a loss for words, really. 

And also with that attitude why don't you just stop being like you are, if you're not happy, why are you here? If someone questions your motives or reasons, belittles you and so on, you just think "oh, what a brave person" ?? 

 

Also, most of the people on this site aren't happy. That is what brought us down this road. If we were happy we wouldn't be struggling with the mental illness, that is ED. 

 

^^^^ yeah. Seriously what the fuck.

Bridgete and I don't agree on tip giving but we can still be civil to each other... You are an adult, why all the hate? I think you need a hug... *HUG*

[BridgeteCara]

No, I just don't think offending someone is being brave and to use "I honestly wish someone would have been and rude to me"  as a statement for saying being rude is ok but in what way is that being a jerk while offending newcomers is being brave? 

 

I stopped taking you seriously after you said "why don't you just stop being like you are, if you're not happy, why are you here?" yeah. this is a fucking eating disorder site. we're all not happy idiot. lmfao "just stop" yeah thats really gonna work.

 

bye.

[BridgeteCara]

Also, most of the people on this site aren't happy. That is what brought us down this road. If we were happy we wouldn't be struggling with the mental illness, that is ED. 

 

Bridgete and I don't agree on tip giving but we can still be civil to each other... You are an adult, why all the hate? I think you need a hug... *HUG*

 

This is what happens when people dont get hugs. sigh. its sad.

[prescription]

I stopped taking you seriously after you said "why don't you just stop being like you are, if you're not happy, why are you here?" yeah. this is a fucking eating disorder site. we're all not happy idiot. lmfao "just stop" yeah thats really gonna work.

 

bye.

Yeah I found that comment a humorous too. Like.. "WOW! I didn't think of not being me! Oh.. wait I did... That's why I am starving away this body... dam it didn't work, still me"

[prescription]

Didn't attack you, questioned your statement as you used it (as I read it) as a reason for being rude against newcomers but claiming that you would have wanted it that way and that would have helped you based on nothing more than that it fits your argument.

[BridgeteCara]

Didn't attack you, questioned your statement as you used it (as I read it) as a reason for being rude against newcomers but claiming that you would have wanted it that way and that would have helped you based on nothing more than that it fits your argument.

LOLLLLLLLLL

[Dancing Queen Dani]

 

I like this xD

[organizedchaos]

I've seen a LOT of this, and it's honestly very discouraging. Nobody has been rude to me personally, but it does make me think twice about posting anything. Another one is " If you haven't been diagnosed with ED you don't have one". I understand that some people don't in fact have an ED, but if you don't know that person you have no idea. Imo it sounds like " you're not sick enough yet, try harder". I'm not at all saying that that is the intention. People forget that these are real people. If you're here you're most likely in a very delicate mental state to begin with and are trying to connect with people who get it. There's no reason to judge or be rude. It's unnecessary really.

[marauder]

Yeahhh, so I definitely felt this haha.

 

I totally get not wanting to encourage others to 'catch an eating disorder,' and I think it's all well-intentioned, but sometimes people just aren't ready or willing to really get into the nitty gritty of their struggles in their very first post. It can also be kind-of damaging on it's own. I joined to try and find some sense of... belonging? not-aloneness? and having the first thing I read basically make me feel like I can't even belong here.. it's discouraging to say the least.

 

xx