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'Functional' Anorexia

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#61 LeaThroughTheLookingGlass

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Posted 06 February 2019 - 01:45 PM

I believe I am a functional anorexic or whatever. I put myself trough treatment. I still have to get up day to day and go to work/ take care of my kids/ pay bills etc. Some days I feel the overwhelm urge to just not adult lol but that isn't an option for me. So yes. I think it's possible to be a functional ED person.
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#62 LeaThroughTheLookingGlass

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Posted 06 February 2019 - 01:47 PM

Eventually I function best when heavily restricting. I try to cover up by being excellent at work, super sociable and kind, so noone would get a feeling of how much I suffer on the inside. With full blown ana I try to be the most perfect version of myself, while when I´m bingeing I let myself go in all matters. I barely go out by then because I feel terrible about myself, I´m too distracted to do a good job at work and I´m all depressed and bitchy.


So yeah. Actually I function better with than without. dunno...

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Posted 08 February 2019 - 03:53 PM

I would consider myself as close to a "functional anorexic" as you can get. I am underweight... but not by much. I don't feel lightheaded, I don't get as irritable, I'm not as obsessed with food, I have my period back, I have a job, I have healthy friendships, I have hobbies, I'm active, I eat well, my hair is thick, my skin is soft...

But I'm still anorexic.

I probably always will be.

I don't know if I'll ever truly stop thinking about calories, portion sizes, workouts, and macros. I don't know if I'll ever throw out my scale. I don't know if I'll ever be a healthy BMI.


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#64 hongkongdreaming

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Posted 08 February 2019 - 04:21 PM

~TinkerBell~" data-cid="64559299" data-time="1533031740" data-date="31 July 2018 - 10:09 AM">

Definitely possible, with the right amount of mental discipline... but challenging.

I'm a post-grad in a medical field, and full-blown anorexia + bulemia stole years of my life before I finally made it to this point.

I'm now working, still pursuing higher academics... BUT STILL OBSESSED with weight and eating...
I'm able to maintain some control
But it's a daily struggle

I don't purge anymore, I don't abuse lax
And I don't over-restrict anymore
And I don't use drugs

My current daily cal intake is 1000
Plus 1-2 fast days per week

I still binge occasionally and go batshit crazy
But I keep going and stay focused

Now I'm planning to up my daily cal intake slowly from 1000 - 1500...
But in order to do so without gaining I need to incorporate a proper work out routine with a good balance of weight training and HIIT

I've already started a work out plan... But I need to build more strength, stamina and muscle mass to take it further...

I realize I've chosen a career path that won't be successful if I continue like this... My body needs more from me

And I'm trying day by day to fight what's inside of me to be the best version of myself

The obsession I suffer with my weight and eating habits is like a demon that has never left me...

My obsessions and fixations still affect my focus, concentration and potential... But I'm fighting

Now I'm taking it one step at a time

So please know... You can take back control of your ED
Make a plan, write that plan in a notebook, stick to your plan.
You won't change overnight, but every step counts
Good luck



It sounds like you’re doing great! If anything it just sounds like super slow recovery, which I’m sure has many benefits - most noticeably minimising de stress by upping weight and calories super fast. I wish you the best and hope you can control make progress to take your life back :)


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Height: 5"7

HW: 123kg // 271lb

SW: 123kg // 271lb (20/05/18)

CW: 70kg // 154lb

GW1: 100kg // 220lb (3/09/18)

GW2: 90kg // 198lb (2/12/18)

GW3: 80kg // 176lb (15/02/19)

GW4 : 75kg // 165lb

GW5: 70kg // 154lb

GW6: 65kg

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GW8: 58kg

UGW: 52kg

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BMI down to overweight - 9/01/19

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Size 10 (UK) - 18/03/19

SIZE 8 UK) - 

SIZE 6 (UK) - 

 

BMI SW: 42.5 (Morbidly Obese)

BMI CBMI: 24.4 (Normal)

≥ 40.0 (Morbid Obesity) / 35.0–39.9 (Severe Obesity) / 30.0–34.9 (Obesity) / 25.0–29.9 (Overweight) / 18.5–24.9 (Normal) / < 18.5 (Underweight)

 

 


#65 SparkleWater

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Posted 21 February 2019 - 02:57 PM

It is possible. I'm a lawyer and I've suffered with anorexia since I was a teenager. I've been in and out of "recovery stages" but it got very bad again during law school. I have now been a qualified lawyer for 3 years and I am doing really well work wise. Mentally....not so much. Recently my psych wanted me to go inpatient (mainly for depression but also the anorexia even though my BMI is currently a disgusting 19.9 but I've gone from 128lbs to 124lbs in 5 days due to heavy restriction and exercise butttt that's another story). Anyway, the point is I feel like work is the only thing that keeps me sane so I refused inpatient treatment and now I'm getting outpatient therapy. Fortunately I JUST avoided sectioning.

 

So I get to work and I'm so busy that I power through and I don't think that much about food at all. It's so freeing! Even though work is incredibly stressful it's a good stress - gets me out of my own head which I need because I really and truly hate myself. It's nice to think about other people and how to fix their problems. 

 

For me, it is not overdramatic to say that if I was sectioned and they took work away from me, I would kill myself.


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#66 Stonerexiccc

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Posted 21 February 2019 - 03:04 PM

considering Ive had earring disorder thoughts for as long as I can remember I feel like its never going to go away. ive read articles on chronic anorexia and I feel like it describes me. Ive shifted my focus from wanting to be ed free to managing it. My way of sustaining an ed/being in college/having a job is high restriction. I eat easily 1200 calories on average a day and then I work out 5 days a week. I also take supplements and make sure to get fruits and veggies in 



#67 light-in-the-crack

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Posted 21 March 2019 - 03:31 PM

Personally my goal is to recover someday, but I feel like I’m kind of a functional Ana right now. I’m basically just maintaining (ugh) and restricting is kind of just a comfort. Idk.

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#68 KittenPurrincess

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Posted 26 March 2019 - 09:53 AM

I was functional at bmi 15 until I broke and binged all the was to bmi 20. I used to high restrict, no exercise except lots of walking, just tired a lot.

#69 DarkDescent

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Posted 26 March 2019 - 09:59 AM

Definitely.
I would describe myself as a functional anorexic, I contain my emotions and thoughts for the most part. 
Unless you knew me personally and I opened up about my e.d. to you, you'd probably never guess anything was wrong, unless you looked for little hints/clues. 
However, I think there are varying degrees in which someone can be a high functioning/functional anorexic. I don't think you can be functional at a very low BMI. I think that's more on the denial side of "functioning".
At a certain point your own denial needs to be addressed to determine Just how functional you truly are. 
Often we are clouded by our own judgment and what one may deem as functional, another may be able to see the situation/behavior more clearly.


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#70 angelkitten

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Posted 26 March 2019 - 09:59 AM

Dis sounds good but I cant maintain until I look emaciated!!!! :P

this is too real


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#71 b.rie

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Posted 26 March 2019 - 10:20 AM

Eventually I function best when heavily restricting. I try to cover up by being excellent at work, super sociable and kind, so noone would get a feeling of how much I suffer on the inside. With full blown ana I try to be the most perfect version of myself, while when I´m bingeing I let myself go in all matters. I barely go out by then because I feel terrible about myself, I´m too distracted to do a good job at work and I´m all depressed and bitchy.
 
So yeah. Actually I function better with than without. dunno...

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Posted 03 April 2019 - 09:05 AM

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#73 Nextoctober

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Posted 04 April 2019 - 06:57 AM

Yup. Been BMI 14-15 for the past 5 years or so. Kept up with (with difficulty at times I'll admit..) a full-time job, got married and bought a house. Functioning but not fully living.


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#74 taetricus

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Posted 04 April 2019 - 07:05 AM

I'm functional at bmi16/17+ 

 

anything lower and not so much. the anorexia just takes priority


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#75 mysterie

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Posted 21 April 2019 - 12:47 PM

My therapist calls what I have "high functioning anorexia"

 

The way she puts it, if I am doing well in school, being social, have a job, and even am succeeding/achieving with so much of my mental energy going to an eating disorder, Imagine where I would be if i had never had an ed. 

 

Basically she said im fatigued and my brain isnt its best when im really hungry... so if I got better, no matter how my life is right now, it would improve by freeing up the mental space and giving me more energy...

 

 

Makes me sad because I was on track to be a doctor by 25 and now I am probably gonna get there at 27... I cry when I think about all the potential and what I could lose if this were to get worse or never really fully improved  

 

 

 

 

(I eat 700-1300 a day and work out 1-2 times a day so I can burn half of the calories I ate)

 

This sounds like me! I feel you. :(

 

I've been 'functional' the past 9 years of my life since I was 14. Restricting where I can, only purging if I overeat at social events/dinners.

 

I've never been a dangerous weight, I've never done treatment, I've never been diagnosed. My lowest bmi was 16. 

 

I've never really had issues at school. Got into a very selective course and am doing well in it. I'm on track to being a doctor in a few years as well.

 

Only issue is now, I'm either relapsing (not sure if this counts because i've never stopped) or getting worse (more likely answer), and I've stopped being as 'functional' as I used to; I purge after almost every meal, mentally and emotionally I feel like a mess.

It's frustrating because I'm studying in a medical/healthcare field and I know what I'm doing is unhealthy. What's worse is the fact that I'm supposed to be at the peak of my life right now, but I'm stuck in a deep deep hole that is my ED.

 

I look at thin people on the street and wonder how they got/stay so thin and I wonder if i can ever be that size without my ED.

 

I look at myself and I wonder if i'll be a better and happier person without my ED. But then again.. I don't really know what I'll be without it.


 

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#76 N'On&

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Posted 21 April 2019 - 01:26 PM

i don't function on bmi 22. i hardly function when i have bmi 18. i start functioning below bmi 17.
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#77 Stonerexiccc

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Posted 21 April 2019 - 01:36 PM

my psychiatrist diagnosed me with chronic anorexia and basically told me it will never go away but you have to learn how to manage it


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#78 milton

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Posted 21 April 2019 - 09:05 PM

i'm definitely functional. i work, clean the house, and for the most part i dress well (in my own way) and look presentable every day if we're going out. i have to take care of my daughter, and i stopped doing drugs and started practicing harm reduction a couple years before she was born. i still drink a little too often but i'm capable. usually the worst that happens now is i get a bit too dizzy from hunger and that means i have to eat something small before i pick her up just in case.

i've found that people worry less when i have the rest of my shit together. i don't like being a hot mess on display as much as i did when i was younger. the novelty is over. i just have to live with this now, as quietly as i can.

#79 milton

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Posted 21 April 2019 - 09:08 PM

It is possible. I'm a lawyer and I've suffered with anorexia since I was a teenager. I've been in and out of "recovery stages" but it got very bad again during law school. I have now been a qualified lawyer for 3 years and I am doing really well work wise. Mentally....not so much. Recently my psych wanted me to go inpatient (mainly for depression but also the anorexia even though my BMI is currently a disgusting 19.9 but I've gone from 128lbs to 124lbs in 5 days due to heavy restriction and exercise butttt that's another story). Anyway, the point is I feel like work is the only thing that keeps me sane so I refused inpatient treatment and now I'm getting outpatient therapy. Fortunately I JUST avoided sectioning.

So I get to work and I'm so busy that I power through and I don't think that much about food at all. It's so freeing! Even though work is incredibly stressful it's a good stress - gets me out of my own head which I need because I really and truly hate myself. It's nice to think about other people and how to fix their problems.

For me, it is not overdramatic to say that if I was sectioned and they took work away from me, I would kill myself.


do you like being a lawyer?? when my little girl starts going to pre-k in a few years i'm going to go to school to become a criminal defense attorney. it's been my dream forever and being a functional anorexic and all, i might as well


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Posted 21 April 2019 - 09:14 PM

I technically have functional anorexia. I hold a job, have friends and a relationship, I’m able to be around friends, family and food, yet I’m still struggling. I can’t imagine how well off I’d be without anorexia...


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