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Pregnancy diary


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#21 420forever

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Posted 28 July 2019 - 10:18 PM

I can’t take this anymore. Everything is bad. People are kicking me out of pregnancy groups, my friends are ...not my friends. I want to die. This baby doesn’t deserve a life with me. I’m a shit person. I deserve to die.

#22 Carter_boii

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Posted 29 July 2019 - 10:31 PM

Im so sorry you're feeling this way. Like extremely. Some of these feelings could be due to the emotional hormones. I wanted to KMS during some weeks of my pregnancy even though it was someway I usually felt it was way worse.
Give me skinny and spooky
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#23 mythics

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Posted 30 July 2019 - 08:29 PM

I’m in Massachusetts so it’s legal. I would love a pax omg but I’m so broke. I have flowers and my husband thinks a vape is worse than flowers so he hides it from me. It makes me absolutely bonkers.

Ugh!!!! That SUCKS! Vaping flowers is so much more beneficial!

burned.


#24 420forever

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Posted 31 July 2019 - 12:38 PM

Ugh!!!! That SUCKS! Vaping flowers is so much more beneficial!

Oooo vaping flower! I hadn’t thought of that! We have a vape that does oils and wax. I’ll def look into getting a flower one!!
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#25 mythics

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Posted 31 July 2019 - 01:22 PM

Oooo vaping flower! I hadn’t thought of that! We have a vape that does oils and wax. I’ll def look into getting a flower one!!

The Pax 1 or 2 is probably relatively inexpensive since the 3 is out now. I swear by my 2, it makes flowers taste so much better

burned.


#26 420forever

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Posted 04 August 2019 - 08:52 AM

A couple of days ago I got my first ultrasound pic lol and promptly lost it :/ typical me. It’s around somewhere. Feeling sick all the time and can rlly only stomach carbs...wooo hooo :/
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#27 420forever

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Posted 04 August 2019 - 08:53 AM

Oh and I binged and gained to 113...slowly loosing it...

#28 420forever

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Posted 07 August 2019 - 11:33 AM

111.6 hm

#29 420forever

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Posted 17 August 2019 - 09:06 PM

115!!!!!! Kms
I restricted pretty okay today, under 500 cals at 10pm but omg my head hurts

#30 420forever

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Posted 23 August 2019 - 08:43 AM

114 no bm tho. My guess is my true weight is around 112-113 which I’m okay with. I’ve beej eating like crazy, my hunger is uncontrollable. I guess I’m letting go . It’s sad but I know it’s for the best :/

#31 420forever

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Posted 03 September 2019 - 10:05 AM

I’ve overgained. I’m disgusting. I can’t stop eating 119.8
12 weeks preg :(

#32 420forever

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Posted 11 September 2019 - 10:45 AM

121.4 yikes but not horrible I guess:/
13 weeks preg
Got another ultrasound and it actually looks like a baby now instead of a bean. Getting a bit more okay with gaining up to 140ish and being 130ish after birth and then I can just loose layer. I’m good. I’m great! Haha just scared of gaining too much/eating to many sweets lol

#33 420forever

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Posted 16 September 2019 - 12:51 PM

125.6 omg :(
14 weeks 15 lbs gained although no bm but fucj fuck fuck I can’t stop binging :(

#34 420forever

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Posted 23 September 2019 - 09:31 PM

123.6 today . Thank god. I just want to maintain this forever while pregnant... it’s okay tho if I’m 150 at the end....
15 weeks, 14 pounds gained

#35 SunFromHell

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Posted 24 September 2019 - 03:09 PM

Be strong!!! We're here, I'm sure you'll be fine!

I'm pregnant too and I'm in my 24th week now (so almost in my 6th month).
I discovered it one week ago...I know...it's crazy (a very long story too).

Never wanted to have a child, but now I'm so glad and I just want to be a better person for my babyboy

I gained 2 kg in total(essentially since I started to see my belly growing), sonograms are very good.

People don't believe it because I have now a very tiny belly, but they say I look good and beautiful and I'm starting to accept my body.

It is very difficult not to think about fast, calories, purging and other stuff, but I've seen changes in my behaviour in these last days.

So don't be cruel to yourself. If you slip, you can try again, and again...

I'm sure you will start to love yourself more, believe me! Just take your time!

sent from my Oneplus 6 using Tapatalk

 

Don't mean to be rude or anything just super curious how did you not notice earlier? Cause it hit me instantly. The tiredness, tender breasts, bloated stomach..Really no judgement just super curious. You don't have to answer.


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#36 SunFromHell

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Posted 24 September 2019 - 03:10 PM

Following


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#37 420forever

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Posted 25 September 2019 - 10:55 AM

Yesterday I was 125.0 and I restricted pretty dang okay-
Today I am 124.4, possibly less and I...idk had some sweets at work but otherwise had a salad and yogurt. So idk !!

#38 Kb314

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Posted 25 September 2019 - 07:05 PM

I hope you are doing ok mentally. I just read all of the posts, Please just think of it as feeding your baby. Being a mom means putting yourself second and the baby first. I had to learn this when I got pregnant. I had been restricting very heavily but I didn’t want anything bad to happen to my baby. Think of all the fun times you will have in the future playing with your baby, running at the park, trick or treating, Easter egg hunting... stay safe
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#39 420forever

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Posted 27 September 2019 - 11:15 AM

Yesterday I pigged the fuck out.
Ate a very healthy lunch / breakfast:kale, zucchini a piece of vegan chicken
Then I went to work and ate like 8 cookies :(
Then I came home and made Matza ball soup and ordered pizza, onion rings and fries!! I barely had any fries at least but wtf :(
So today I’m 126
Gonna try to eat just veggies today. We will see how I do
In 2 days I have a fancy party to go to and my friends are all so much skinner than me. Even though I’m 4 months pregnant I don’t look pregnant so I haven’t told my friends yet. I just look fat. It’s okay. I’m shocked that I’m still in the 120’s I look at least 138. I think that’s a good stopping number , like 138-145. Seeing numbers around there will relapse me hard, I swear. I also forgot to drink my lax tea cus I was so tired. Oh I might have dinner w a friend tomorrow-I’ll just get salad...aghhhhk I wanna be 123 for my doctors apt next week. I don’t wanna keep gaining so quickly

#40 420forever

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Posted 30 September 2019 - 12:50 PM

127 today :(
Almost 16 months.
That’s over twenty pounds from my lowest and that sucks
Each morning I try to fast and each day I try and restrict them at work all my care goes out the window
I have a doctors appointment too tomorrow fuck


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