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Do you think you should hide your ED if your a male

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#1 shadowsurfer

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Posted 16 February 2020 - 05:32 PM

Like there is huge stigma around this. Like i went to treatment and the place was centered around females and i was the only male there the 7 times i was there. Like even in the other 2 treatment places i went to.

 

Like for me i was always told to "not tell any one because its embarrassing to have people know " as a result its never been talking about with my  not so normal family. The phrase it as my "blips" 

 

I think in general EDs are always trying to be hid. What do you guys think??

 

Curious to know if there are many males active on mpa actually. 


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#2 Bonesking

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Posted 16 February 2020 - 05:34 PM

I’m definitely hiding mine, but it’s not like I’m skinny enough for anyone to suspect beyond my friends saying I should eat more (but not it a way that implies I’m gonna die if I don’t)


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#3 Guest_Минаa_*

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Posted 16 February 2020 - 05:35 PM

There are quite a few active males on here. I happen to be female, but just wanted to weigh in (no pun intended) on this a little. 

 

I mean, isn't it normal for everyone with an ED to be secretive about it? I honestly don't know anyone who is open about it unless they're in super recovery mode and even then they usually don't bring it up unless someone mentions it first.

 

It's kind of the nature of the illness.. if you want to keep being self-destructive, you can't exactly tell people or they might stop you?


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#4 WilliamWillTell

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Posted 16 February 2020 - 05:37 PM

I hide mine like I hide any mental health issue. It's just the stigma in general, not because I'm male though. But honestly when I was younger I first learned to hide it on places like this so that I couldn't be forced into treatment.
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#5 shadowsurfer

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Posted 16 February 2020 - 05:41 PM

There are quite a few active males on here. I happen to be female, but just wanted to weigh in (no pun intended) on this a little. 

 

I mean, isn't it normal for everyone with an ED to be secretive about it? I honestly don't know anyone who is open about it unless they're in super recovery mode and even then they usually don't bring it up unless someone mentions it first.

 

It's kind of the nature of the illness.. if you want to keep being self-destructive, you can't exactly tell people or they might stop you?

 

 

I think it is the norm to be secretive no matter what. Yes self sabotage is me to T  :P  :P


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#6 shadowsurfer

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Posted 16 February 2020 - 05:43 PM

I hide mine like I hide any mental health issue. It's just the stigma in general, not because I'm male though. But honestly when I was younger I first learned to hide it on places like this so that I couldn't be forced into treatment

 

yes your so right


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#7 miaowkitty

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Posted 16 February 2020 - 06:07 PM

I see almost as many males as females on here actually. I've noticed though that guys seem to put their gender as not specified a lot as if they're embarrassed, which I don't blame them for with the stigma. Eating disorders don't discriminate though, and it has literally nothing to do with being a skinny perfect white girl, it's a complex gentic psychological disorder, just like schizophrenia. You wouldn't expect schizophrenia to only be a female disorder. It's not about trying to be skinny and cute, it's a psychological disorder, you can't choose it anymore than you can choose which colour your skin is.


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#8 Weldon

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Posted 16 February 2020 - 07:35 PM

I don't think it should be hidden just because we are males.  It is less socially acceptable for males but I don't think that means we should hide it.  I think ED in general are a something that people hide regardless of their gender.  It takes a lot of strength to admit our problems.  Places like MPA are a valuable tool to loosen the grip that the ED has on us and helps us break the silence and not feel so isolated.


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#9 shadowsurfer

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Posted 17 February 2020 - 09:31 AM

Thats why i keep coming back here ! everyone here is always nice :)


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#10 sblsg

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Posted 17 February 2020 - 08:38 PM

been hiding mine forever


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#11 Cyclades

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Posted 17 February 2020 - 11:47 PM

I dont want people to see my in general. Also EDs are centred around females so little space for guys to exist.

Eds arent glamourous but its perceived to be for females. If youre a guy you look like you arr sick from something else or youre a junkie
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#12 skinnyboyeternal

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Posted 18 February 2020 - 09:57 AM

if you're straight and have any intention of getting laid, yes. body self-consciousness / exception seems way more tolerated in the gay community, girls get turned the fuck off. most girls want to be with a guy who is fatter than them

 

sources: i am 25, have had sex 3 times in my life, i have an ED, and i'm straight


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#13 gamedayspecial

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Posted 18 February 2020 - 12:52 PM

I used to hide it like it was a deep secret. Now I just don’t care. It is who I am and who I have been my whole life. I don’t broadcast the fact that I have an ED but I don’t hide it. If somebody notices something I do that is ED related and asks me about it I don’t deny that I did it but nor do I tell them I have an ED.

I’m straight and I don’t care if anyone thinks otherwise because I have an ED. A few girls hav3 told me I’m too skinny at times. But I have never had a problem. If anything, my not give a shit attitude I used to have was a much bigger turnoff than my ED.
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#14 miaowkitty

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Posted 18 February 2020 - 12:55 PM

I dont want people to see my in general. Also EDs are centred around females so little space for guys to exist.

Eds arent glamourous but its perceived to be for females. If youre a guy you look like you arr sick from something else or youre a junkie

People see skinny girls and think "anorexia".

People see skinny guys and think "meth".


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#15 PhoenicianPrincess

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Posted 20 February 2020 - 08:46 PM

People see skinny girls and think "anorexia".

People see skinny guys and think "meth".

 

I think there would have other factors related to a guy's appearance for them to think "meth head". I've been at a BMI of 15 and less for a decade plus, and people have thought I was anorexic, but never a meth addict. Well, because I usually look put together and don't act like I'm on drugs (because I'm not).


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#16 ItsBoshyTime

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Posted 20 February 2020 - 09:44 PM

I only tell it to really close friends
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#17 spideyman

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Posted 21 February 2020 - 01:50 AM

Personally I think it depends on what you mean by hide. 

As far as being discreet with disordered habits, I could have scabs on my hands, run to the bathroom blatantly immediately after every meal, go to the kitchen maybe only once a day, never eat dinner with family, and drop 50 pounds in 2 months and no one would suspect anything. It's like people are blind to eating disorders when it comes to guys. You see a stick thin girl and you wonder if she has an ED. You see a stick thin guy and you think "oh it's just another boy with a shit diet and high metabolism.". Skinny girls are points of jealousy and admiration. Skinny guys are made fun of for not being muscular (though it's easier to be a skinny guy than a fat guy). 

 

I don't think you need to hide disordered habits bc no one cares. Which I'm not personally complaining about. Of course it's an issue in the overall scale of things but it works in my favour right now so I don't care. 

As far as hiding your disorder when you're in recovery or are reaching out, I think you need to hide it in certain situations and around certain types of people because it would unfortunately make people probably lose respect for you if they're ignorant to the issue. but it's important to be honest with people you care about. 


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#18 skinnyboyeternal

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Posted 21 February 2020 - 02:19 PM

I used to hide it like it was a deep secret. Now I just don’t care. It is who I am and who I have been my whole life. I don’t broadcast the fact that I have an ED but I don’t hide it. If somebody notices something I do that is ED related and asks me about it I don’t deny that I did it but nor do I tell them I have an ED.

I’m straight and I don’t care if anyone thinks otherwise because I have an ED. A few girls hav3 told me I’m too skinny at times. But I have never had a problem. If anything, my not give a shit attitude I used to have was a much bigger turnoff than my ED.

Fuck it dude, skinny works better in bed and is sexier. I dont give a fuck what anyone thinks. If you have a nice cock (which i do) who cares?


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#19 LeanDude

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Posted 15 March 2020 - 11:20 AM

A dude with ED. No way I'm saying anything. A large guy would consider me kind of skinny, but the  mirror  tells a different story. I sometimes get comments like "you can afford to eat that" when talking about cookies or something. Well, no I can't and don't want to. And I don't want to get into it with people.


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#20 Lloyd

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Posted 21 March 2020 - 08:53 AM

Like there is huge stigma around this. Like i went to treatment and the place was centered around females and i was the only male there the 7 times i was there. Like even in the other 2 treatment places i went to.

Like for me i was always told to "not tell any one because its embarrassing to have people know " as a result its never been talking about with my not so normal family. The phrase it as my "blips"

I think in general EDs are always trying to be hid. What do you guys think??

Curious to know if there are many males active on mpa actually.

I totally understand that, I hid mine the best I can.
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