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Looking for my tribe


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28 replies to this topic

#1 Used2bskinny

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Posted 15 June 2020 - 11:35 PM

I posted this in another forum, but one of the members said this might be a better fit. I’m 48 and a mom to 5. I went through menopause at 45. I’m struggling with binge eating and heavy restricting. I’ve never had a normal relationship with food. It’s always one or the other. I’m going through a divorce and I’m really struggling with losing weight. I’m mostly restricting right now because it’s the only thing that gives me a sense of control in my life, but the weight is just not coming off. Anyone in the same boat as me? I’m feeling very alone lately.
  • *~pixie angelheart~*, Foreverlonely, Ethel-Ether and 2 others like this
Hw:230
Starting weight:219.9
Current weight:219.7-May 26,2020
Goal weight 1:210-
Goal weight 2:200-
Goal weight 3:190-
Goal weight 4:180-
Goal weight 5:170-
Goal weight 6:160-
Goal weight 7:150-
Goal weight 8:140-
Goal weight 9:130-
Goal weight 10:120
Goal weight 11:110
Goal weight 12:100
Final goal weight: 90-

#2 thesekidsdrivememad

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Posted 17 June 2020 - 01:27 AM

With you there, I'm 49 but only showing any minor signs of peri at the moment. Ive also struggled since mid teens. But losing at this time of life is hard, way harder than it used to be.

There's a great little support group here on this board, and we run a monthly joint accountability. Come on in and introduce yourself. All welcome.
  • Used2bskinny and Ethel-Ether like this
Height 5`8"
HW/SW 265lbs BMI 40.3 (17th June 2017)
CW 149.6lb
LW 150lb (as an adult), 133lb (at 16/17)

GW1 199lb (achieved 6th November 2017)
GW2 164lb healthy BMI (achieved 21st March 2020)
GW3 154lb pre babies (achieved 26th May 2020)
GW4 139lb teenage set point
Gw5 132.5 half the I used to be

Latest in a long line of accountabilitys

https://www.myproana...far/?p=72535881

#3 ButtonsAligned

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Posted 21 June 2020 - 12:10 PM

I posted this in another forum, but one of the members said this might be a better fit. I’m 48 and a mom to 5. I went through menopause at 45. I’m struggling with binge eating and heavy restricting. I’ve never had a normal relationship with food. It’s always one or the other. I’m going through a divorce and I’m really struggling with losing weight. I’m mostly restricting right now because it’s the only thing that gives me a sense of control in my life, but the weight is just not coming off. Anyone in the same boat as me? I’m feeling very alone lately.


Greetings Y2B and welcome.

I may be slow to reply at times but I am interested in the topics you have raised.
Healthy eating is challenging at the best of times, but with 5 kids and a divorce it will be so much more so. Please share your experiences. Your voice is very welcome here.

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#4 Used2bskinny

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Posted 21 June 2020 - 01:22 PM

Greetings Y2B and welcome.
I may be slow to reply at times but I am interested in the topics you have raised.
Healthy eating is challenging at the best of times, but with 5 kids and a divorce it will be so much more so. Please share your experiences. Your voice is very welcome here.
BA


I find it so hard sometimes to cook for my kids. I cook healthy things for them, but I still want to eat more than I need to some days. Other days I don’t eat at all. It’s a vicious cycle. Have you gone through menopause? Losing weight now feels impossible. I’ve gained 40 pounds going through this divorce and the scale is hardly budging. I am going through a cycle of gaining and losing the same two pounds for about three weeks now. I haven’t binged at all so it just seems so unfair! What are your experiences?
Hw:230
Starting weight:219.9
Current weight:219.7-May 26,2020
Goal weight 1:210-
Goal weight 2:200-
Goal weight 3:190-
Goal weight 4:180-
Goal weight 5:170-
Goal weight 6:160-
Goal weight 7:150-
Goal weight 8:140-
Goal weight 9:130-
Goal weight 10:120
Goal weight 11:110
Goal weight 12:100
Final goal weight: 90-

#5 Used2bskinny

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Posted 21 June 2020 - 01:23 PM

With you there, I'm 49 but only showing any minor signs of peri at the moment. Ive also struggled since mid teens. But losing at this time of life is hard, way harder than it used to be.
There's a great little support group here on this board, and we run a monthly joint accountability. Come on in and introduce yourself. All welcome.


Thank you! How do I find the joint accountability?
  • thesekidsdrivememad likes this
Hw:230
Starting weight:219.9
Current weight:219.7-May 26,2020
Goal weight 1:210-
Goal weight 2:200-
Goal weight 3:190-
Goal weight 4:180-
Goal weight 5:170-
Goal weight 6:160-
Goal weight 7:150-
Goal weight 8:140-
Goal weight 9:130-
Goal weight 10:120
Goal weight 11:110
Goal weight 12:100
Final goal weight: 90-

#6 thesekidsdrivememad

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Posted 22 June 2020 - 01:43 AM

Thank you! How do I find the joint accountability?


It's here on this board. Simply called June accountability, were a friendly little group.
Height 5`8"
HW/SW 265lbs BMI 40.3 (17th June 2017)
CW 149.6lb
LW 150lb (as an adult), 133lb (at 16/17)

GW1 199lb (achieved 6th November 2017)
GW2 164lb healthy BMI (achieved 21st March 2020)
GW3 154lb pre babies (achieved 26th May 2020)
GW4 139lb teenage set point
Gw5 132.5 half the I used to be

Latest in a long line of accountabilitys

https://www.myproana...far/?p=72535881

#7 Growerofweeds

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Posted 30 June 2020 - 08:24 PM

Omg this is exactly what I came here to ask! I am 43. Only 3years ago I was 85 lbs bmi 14. Had NO trouble losing any weight up until now. I am a master at it, honestly it's been the one thing I feel like I'm good at when all else fails, you know? I have had anorexia purging type on and off over the years of recovery/relapse since I was 13. I can tell you how many calories is in everything.
Anyway, my health was worse than it had ever been, my family was begging me to get help etc, so recovery happened. And for a while I worked so hard at it, at being OK with my bigger body and being able to eat dessert again was AWESOME! I normally (during recovery times) settle into 130 lbs as a set point weight, so that's what I expected. I went to 135, I was like ok that's fine I guess... but my doc put me on an anxiety med which made me gain 15 lbs in 4 weeks! I figured out it was the pills and stopped them. Then at 150 started to diet just a bit to go back to normal. I went down to 145 pretty fast, but for the last 6 weeks I am averaging 500-800 cals per day and only lost 2 freaking lbs! Most days I'm eating less than I did at my lowest! Wtf is going on?? I hate it. I'm sweaty. Can't even look in mirrors or at pictures. Constantly check out my old skinny pics. Ugh. I am definitely full on relapsed now. Ate icecream yesterday and purged for the first time in a long time. I am so ashamed. I dont know what to do. I had this evil disorder.
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recovery hell


#8 Thaisa

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Posted 03 July 2020 - 02:08 PM

Geez this sounds so frustrating. I don’t have any words of wisdom but I wanted to say welcome and glad you are here.

Omg this is exactly what I came here to ask! I am 43. Only 3years ago I was 85 lbs bmi 14. Had NO trouble losing any weight up until now. I am a master at it, honestly it's been the one thing I feel like I'm good at when all else fails, you know? I have had anorexia purging type on and off over the years of recovery/relapse since I was 13. I can tell you how many calories is in everything.
Anyway, my health was worse than it had ever been, my family was begging me to get help etc, so recovery happened. And for a while I worked so hard at it, at being OK with my bigger body and being able to eat dessert again was AWESOME! I normally (during recovery times) settle into 130 lbs as a set point weight, so that's what I expected. I went to 135, I was like ok that's fine I guess... but my doc put me on an anxiety med which made me gain 15 lbs in 4 weeks! I figured out it was the pills and stopped them. Then at 150 started to diet just a bit to go back to normal. I went down to 145 pretty fast, but for the last 6 weeks I am averaging 500-800 cals per day and only lost 2 freaking lbs! Most days I'm eating less than I did at my lowest! Wtf is going on?? I hate it. I'm sweaty. Can't even look in mirrors or at pictures. Constantly check out my old skinny pics. Ugh. I am definitely full on relapsed now. Ate icecream yesterday and purged for the first time in a long time. I am so ashamed. I dont know what to do. I had this evil disorder.


Current weight: 123-126

Height: 5'6"

Ortho athlete

40+

Goal: nutritious eating without purging + to get back to my lean weight of 115 lbs

 


#9 Ethel-Ether

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Posted 14 July 2020 - 06:55 AM

Absolutely in the same boat!!!

 

I've been doing really well (I thought) with restriction for about 3 weeks...lost 0.6 lbs.  It's ridiculous.


  • *~pixie angelheart~* likes this

5'4, CW 162, LW 110, 40 y/o - HW 163 162 161 160159 158 157156 155 154 153 152 151 150 149 148 147 146 145 144 143 142 141 140 139 138 137 136 135 134 133 132 131 130 129 128 127 126 125 124 123 122 121 120 119 118 117 116 115 114 113 112 111 UGW 110 - - - So many pounds above.


#10 *~pixie angelheart~*

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Posted 14 July 2020 - 06:06 PM

I posted this in another forum, but one of the members said this might be a better fit. I’m 48 and a mom to 5. I went through menopause at 45. I’m struggling with binge eating and heavy restricting. I’ve never had a normal relationship with food. It’s always one or the other. I’m going through a divorce and I’m really struggling with losing weight. I’m mostly restricting right now because it’s the only thing that gives me a sense of control in my life, but the weight is just not coming off. Anyone in the same boat as me? I’m feeling very alone lately.

 

I'm so sorry to hear that you're dealing with a divorce.  :(  I went through one about a year and a half ago, and I'm still trying to recover from it and, of course, the marriage itself, just in general. I'm 54 and post-menopausal. I've gained weight, too, for a variety of reasons, and I'm not sure I'll ever be able to get it off.  :unsure: 


55-years-old

5'5"

  Current BMI: "Normal" (i.e., FAT!)

 

Usual ED Diagnosis: 

AN (restricting type)

 

 

Lowest Adult Weight: 87 lbs (BMI 14.5)

HW: 165 lbs (pregnancy)

GW: 90 lbs (BMI 15)

 

~accountability~

https://www.myproana.com/index.php/topic/4037131-angelhearts-hope-refusing-to-give-up-pics//

 

~pics~

https://www.myproana.com/index.php/gallery/album/5861-pics-of-me/


#11 Disciplined gal

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Posted 21 July 2020 - 11:22 AM

Hi there! I am new to this forum as well! Would love to be part of your tribe. I am 45- almost 46. Mother of 1. Same struggles with weight. I finally lost 15 pounds by April of this year but have been stuck since then.
  • *~pixie angelheart~* likes this
Last starting weight: 130
———————————
Current weight: 109.5
———————————
Goal weight 1= 110
Goal weight 2= 105
Goal weight 3= 100

#12 *~pixie angelheart~*

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Posted 21 July 2020 - 12:05 PM

Hi there! I am new to this forum as well! Would love to be part of your tribe. I am 45- almost 46. Mother of 1. Same struggles with weight. I finally lost 15 pounds by April of this year but have been stuck since then.

 

Welcome!  :)


55-years-old

5'5"

  Current BMI: "Normal" (i.e., FAT!)

 

Usual ED Diagnosis: 

AN (restricting type)

 

 

Lowest Adult Weight: 87 lbs (BMI 14.5)

HW: 165 lbs (pregnancy)

GW: 90 lbs (BMI 15)

 

~accountability~

https://www.myproana.com/index.php/topic/4037131-angelhearts-hope-refusing-to-give-up-pics//

 

~pics~

https://www.myproana.com/index.php/gallery/album/5861-pics-of-me/


#13 ProDancer

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Posted 21 July 2020 - 11:22 PM

Hi friends!
I’m 47, married and we have a precious 9 year old daughter.
I’m 5’6” 103 pounds.
My biggest fear is giving my daughter In healthy habits or any negative body issue.
My biggest challenge is my husband and parents are ***constantly obsessing*** about my weight and what I eat. My husband was crying at dinner tonight asking me to gain weight. I personally think I look great (other than a gaunt face and visible veins in my body and limbs). Their hounding me daily (plus we have dinner at my parents house once a week) stresses me out.
My husband also makes me do impromptu ‘weigh ins” to check my weight. I’m not a scale-obsessed person. I like the way I look & monitor my diet based on how I look.
As you can see by my handle, i am a professional dancer. I was an elite level one, but I only teach now. I believe I would not be as successful in my career if I was not slender (including now, just as a teacher). People do not take fat dance teachers seriously = less $$.
I’ve had no problem losing weight despite my age. Lots of veggies, coffee, SF Jello & a couple daily protein shakes works for me. I feel the key is patience and consistency. Crash diets = short term results, and possibly alarm your doctor. I’ve lost 20 pounds over the past few years, and am rarely hungry. To lose more weight, I just cut out my lean meats woth dinner for a few days. But my husband just noticed that, so I may need to come up with another tactic.
I’m so happy to see other people here close to my own age and with families!
  • *~pixie angelheart~* likes this

#14 Disciplined gal

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Posted 22 July 2020 - 06:40 AM

Hi Dancer!

Your weight is around my goal weight. I am aiming to be 100-105. We are around the same height. Currently been at 115 for a few months. Do you dance a lot as an instructor or do other exercise? I also have one daughter and no other children. My husband basically leaves me alone (And rarely pays attention to me) but it’s when I get around 110 that he starts saying I am too thin. Our marriage is not the happiest. I am new to the boards but it feels good to talk about some of the things other people don’t understand. Thank you!
  • *~pixie angelheart~* likes this
Last starting weight: 130
———————————
Current weight: 109.5
———————————
Goal weight 1= 110
Goal weight 2= 105
Goal weight 3= 100

#15 Disciplined gal

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Posted 22 July 2020 - 06:40 AM

Hi Dancer!

Your weight is around my goal weight. I am aiming to be 100-105. We are around the same height. Currently been at 115 for a few months. Do you dance a lot as an instructor or do other exercise? I also have one daughter and no other children. My husband basically leaves me alone (And rarely pays attention to me) but it’s when I get around 110 that he starts saying I am too thin. Our marriage is not the happiest. I am new to the boards but it feels good to talk about some of the things other people don’t understand. Thank you!
Last starting weight: 130
———————————
Current weight: 109.5
———————————
Goal weight 1= 110
Goal weight 2= 105
Goal weight 3= 100

#16 Disciplined gal

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Posted 22 July 2020 - 07:22 AM

Update- just weighed and it looks like me weight is down a pound or two this morning. I will start posting on the accountability board in august.
  • *~pixie angelheart~* likes this
Last starting weight: 130
———————————
Current weight: 109.5
———————————
Goal weight 1= 110
Goal weight 2= 105
Goal weight 3= 100

#17 *~pixie angelheart~*

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Posted 22 July 2020 - 02:45 PM

My biggest challenge is my husband and parents are ***constantly obsessing*** about my weight and what I eat. My husband was crying at dinner tonight asking me to gain weight. I personally think I look great (other than a gaunt face and visible veins in my body and limbs). Their hounding me daily (plus we have dinner at my parents house once a week) stresses me out.
My husband also makes me do impromptu ‘weigh ins” to check my weight.

 

Welcome!  :)  I know it's probably difficult to think of things this way, but please try to be thankful that your husband seems to really care about you. My ex did NOT. He was hoping that my ED would eventually kill me, and if I hadn't left him when I did, I'm pretty sure he would have eventually pulled the plug himself. He did everything he could to keep me sick, including not allowing me to get the treatment that might have saved me from all of this years ago, even though we had the money for it.  :( 

 

My husband basically leaves me alone (And rarely pays attention to me) but it’s when I get around 110 that he starts saying I am too thin. Our marriage is not the happiest. I am new to the boards but it feels good to talk about some of the things other people don’t understand. Thank you!

 

I really hope your husband isn't as bad as mine was, hon.  :( How does it make you feel that he doesn't pay any attention to you or what you're doing to yourself?


55-years-old

5'5"

  Current BMI: "Normal" (i.e., FAT!)

 

Usual ED Diagnosis: 

AN (restricting type)

 

 

Lowest Adult Weight: 87 lbs (BMI 14.5)

HW: 165 lbs (pregnancy)

GW: 90 lbs (BMI 15)

 

~accountability~

https://www.myproana.com/index.php/topic/4037131-angelhearts-hope-refusing-to-give-up-pics//

 

~pics~

https://www.myproana.com/index.php/gallery/album/5861-pics-of-me/


#18 ProDancer

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Posted 22 July 2020 - 10:38 PM

Hi Dancer!

Your weight is around my goal weight. I am aiming to be 100-105. We are around the same height. Currently been at 115 for a few months. Do you dance a lot as an instructor or do other exercise? I also have one daughter and no other children. My husband basically leaves me alone (And rarely pays attention to me) but it’s when I get around 110 that he starts saying I am too thin. Our marriage is not the happiest. I am new to the boards but it feels good to talk about some of the things other people don’t understand. Thank you!



#19 ProDancer

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Posted 22 July 2020 - 10:47 PM

The only exercise I get is as a dance teacher. I find that is more than enough! Dancing is hard on your body, if I did anything else I’d have to dance less. I am sad to hear your marriage isn’t going well. No marriage is perfect. My husband has his issues, as they all do. I was in our back yard wearing my swimsuit today and he cane out to touch the veins in my biceps and beg me to eat more. Maybe I’m nuts, but I think I look good. And I feel good. I’ve been in the mid-teens, and think I look good at that weight as well. And it’s easier to find clothes at that size.

#20 ProDancer

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Posted 22 July 2020 - 10:48 PM

Welcome! :) I know it's probably difficult to think of things this way, but please try to be thankful that your husband seems to really care about you. My ex did NOT. He was hoping that my ED would eventually kill me, and if I hadn't left him when I did, I'm pretty sure he would have eventually pulled the plug himself. He did everything he could to keep me sick, including not allowing me to get the treatment that might have saved me from all of this years ago, even though we had the money for it. :(


I really hope your husband isn't as bad as mine was, hon. :( How does it make you feel that he doesn't pay any attention to you or what you're doing to yourself?




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