How much does your SO/Partner know about your ED? - Age 20+ - Forums and Community

Jump to content


About MPA

MPA is a site dedicated to the support or recovery of those suffering from eating disorders or body dysmorphic disorders. Please be sensitive to this fact when creating an account and contributing to the board.


Photo

How much does your SO/Partner know about your ED?


  • Please log in to reply
30 replies to this topic

#1 Leo_Leo

Leo_Leo

    Advanced Member

  • Accountability access
  • PipPipPip
  • 90 posts

Posted 16 June 2020 - 12:40 PM

My fiance (dating for 7 years) found out about my history of anorexia a year into our relationship - I told him blackout drunk in college while heaving my guts into a toilet. Classy, I know. 

 

We moved in together and I relapsed about 2 years ago and went back to professional help. He spoke to my therapist who told him we should not have a scale in our home. He goes away regularly on business trips so he worries about my eating. Around that time, he found my hidden scale and hid it again. It's taken me over a year to convince him I can use it in moderation, (literally the past month or so) which I most likely am not. 

 

Curious to see if others live with their partner or SO or are just in a serious relationship and how they juggle their ED (and purposefully fucking up recovery like yours truly). 


Little fat fuck trying her best. 

 

Age: 24 

Height: 4'11" (little guy) 

LW: 88 lbs (1,000,000 years ago) 

HW: 108 lbs

3/1/2020: 103 lbs 

CW: 97 lbs (bruh) 

BMI: 19.6

(X) GW 1: 100 

( ) GW 2: 95

( ) GW 3: 90 

 

 

No self control. 


#2 OfficialMelaniaTrump

OfficialMelaniaTrump

    Choose your own title! PM Admin or Bibs.

  • Validating
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 10181 posts

Posted 16 June 2020 - 12:46 PM

No one knows and no one ever will. End of it. 

 

Husband has a thyroid issue and gains easily, so low cal foods are staples at my house. I do not think I could ever be detected.


  • redtree likes this

#3 Avyeon

Avyeon

    Advanced Sage

  • Accountability access
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 2050 posts
  • LocationNetherlands

Posted 16 June 2020 - 12:54 PM

My ex boyfriend knew about it and would still ask for half my 250 cal piece of fish that was my dinner that night. He also said I was cheating weight loss lol. He sucked overall as a person.  


  • lissome and chococat like this

giphy.gif

 

Age: 22 │ Height: 5'5 3/4 │ SW: 190 lbs │ LW: 132 lbs  CW: 175 lbs │ GW: 165 lbs │ UGW: 110 lbs

Diagnosed Bulimia / BED January 10th 2018

 

Accountability:

https://www.myproana.../#entry71822441


 

 


#4 Booksmart

Booksmart

    Advanced Guru

  • Accountability access
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 744 posts

Posted 16 June 2020 - 01:32 PM

My bf of almost 3 years has known since the beginning, and is very good. He's upfront about how there are things he'll never understand, but still stays there for me no matter what. If he suspects something is up/I'm relapsing (which usually he figures out pretty quick), he tries his best to encourage me to eat, reassure me I'm not eating too much, that he loves me as I am, etc. But it's still pretty easy to engage in behaviors around him. I knw it hurts him to see me struggle, especially when we're usually so open with each other. But he is really helpful in supporting me and my mental health <3


  • redtree and googlyeyes like this

Quarantine relapse got me good lmao

 

5'3.5

HW: 147

LW: 96

CW: 128.8

GW: 88

 

145 144 143 142 141 140 139 138 137 136 135 134 133 132 131 130  129 128 127 126 125  124

  123 122 121 120 119 118 117 116 115 1114 113 112 111 110  109 108 107 106 105

104 103 102 101 100  99 98 97 96 95

94 93 92 91 90

89 88


#5 Kaizume

Kaizume

    Newbie

  • New Members
  • Pip
  • 3 posts

Posted 16 June 2020 - 03:12 PM

I’ve been with my bf for over a year now and he’s aware of the Ed but not to the full extent. While with him I ended up gaining 30 pounds as he would always love to cook for me and thought it was good that I ate more but since then I’ve had him stop and have been fasting on and off to lose all of this weight and to finally get to my ugw. It doesn’t help that he’s skinny :( 



#6 Jacqueline_356

Jacqueline_356

    Sage

  • Accountability access
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 1051 posts

Posted 16 June 2020 - 05:43 PM

Ever since I started living with my boyfriend he noticed that I wasn't getting my period, and whe he asked me why I told him it was because I ate too little. He knows I restrict and I measure/portfion my food in front of him and am an overall picky eater. I don't let him serve me, I have to serve myself and I prefer to cook out meals so I can control the calories. I've told him sometimes I get anxious when we eat out because I don't know exactly what's in my food. I take laxatives but I'm not sure he knows about that. I also b/p sometimes but I don't think he's caught on to that either (tgod). 

 

At first he didn't really handle it well and we'd just avoid the topic. Once he got mad at me because I was pestering him about how I wanted him to prepare my meal (annoying of me, ik). But now he seems to be taking it better, just asking me most days what I've eaten and that I should eat more. He usually isn't too pushy though. I'm glad that he is being mature and considerate about it. 



#7 redtree

redtree

    Sage

  • Accountability access
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 1110 posts
  • Locationin your hEEEeeaaad ZOMBIE ZOM BEH EH EH

Posted 16 June 2020 - 05:57 PM

He has known since the beginning. I relapsed hardcore when I was living with him+his parents....that was awkward as fuuuuck (they figured it out obviously...) 

 

He encourages me to eat and always compliments me or tells me : "Mmm, love watching my girl eat!" 

 

It is really quite sweet and helps keep me on track. 

 

Though I admit, relapse is very tempting lately :(


          gallery_4356_2145_32545.jpg

                     

            

 

 

 

 


#8 redtree

redtree

    Sage

  • Accountability access
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 1110 posts
  • Locationin your hEEEeeaaad ZOMBIE ZOM BEH EH EH

Posted 16 June 2020 - 05:58 PM

No one knows and no one ever will. End of it. 

 

Husband has a thyroid issue and gains easily, so low cal foods are staples at my house. I do not think I could ever be detected.

 

Hi girrrrlllll I may be joining you soon.... 


          gallery_4356_2145_32545.jpg

                     

            

 

 

 

 


#9 thelostkitten

thelostkitten

    Advanced Guru

  • Accountability access
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 843 posts
  • LocationEurope

Posted 16 June 2020 - 06:03 PM

He thinks i have odd food habits. He knows very very little about eating disorders or even calories really. During the high point of my purging I managed to avoid him finding out.

Отправлено с моего ZTE Blade A0722 через Tapatalk
Height : 5'7 / 170cm
Gw: 45-50kg

#10 ~fern~

~fern~

    Advanced Guru

  • Accountability access
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 718 posts

Posted 16 June 2020 - 06:56 PM

he knows like 95% of it all but has always had an inkling,

i explained it all when i started relapsing like 2 years ago.

and have since been letting him in on different aspects of it.

 

we've been together like 7 years now and live together so would be weird if he had no clue.

he's very attentive so would have guessed anyway, but if i had kept it hidden i'd feel wrong.


  • redtree likes this
tumblr inline ouc8at8L9E1reem51 400

 

 


#11 mythics

mythics

    A Rock

  • Accountability access
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 1643 posts
  • Locationneptune

Posted 17 June 2020 - 06:28 AM

My husband knows everything about it. He also suffers from ED and has most of his life. Hes really great about everything

Sent from my SM-A505U using Tapatalk

burned.


#12 OfficialMelaniaTrump

OfficialMelaniaTrump

    Choose your own title! PM Admin or Bibs.

  • Validating
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 10181 posts

Posted 17 June 2020 - 09:58 AM

Hi girrrrlllll I may be joining you soon.... 

 

Haha how so?? (Sorry I might be forgetting something)



#13 meee

meee

    Advanced Warrior

  • Accountability access
  • PipPipPipPipPip
  • 477 posts

Posted 21 June 2020 - 03:25 PM

my husband knows about my ed... we met a month before i was admited to ed clinic... he also had bed and an.... hes very supportive... but i feel like when i was bulimic he loved me more, now i have anorexia and feel like he doesnt love me anymore... i just feel disgusting and it fills my ed


They yell at me because I can't see what they see. Nobody can explain to me why my eyes work different than theirs. Nobody can make it stop.
 
 85ec0fd57537580e50a244cd7c989bab.png

NOT NATIVE AMERICAN SPEAKER


#14 CravingComfortInBones💀

CravingComfortInBones💀

    Member

  • Members
  • PipPip
  • 18 posts

Posted 22 June 2020 - 01:05 AM

I've been with my boyfriend for five years now. He's learned everything overtime. Now he just accepts certain things that he knows he can't change- diets, compulsive weigh-ins, etc... while also trying to help me work through the real tough things- overeating, b/p, lax abuse... It's hard for him to understand, but knows it's a constant struggle for me, so he just makes sure I know that i'm wonderful no matter my weight or size. Sometimes we can even make jokes about it without it crossing any lines (sarcasm is so much easier for me to handle the more serious things).

While I am extremely grateful for him, I also secretly sometimes regret letting him know any of it. It's hard to keep it hidden, and I feel so guilty when he gets sad and frustrated when i start to get physically ill from lack of food and nutrients. 

Hopefully one day it will get easier though..



#15 Sae.

Sae.

    Advanced Sage

  • Accountability access
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 1660 posts
  • LocationUS

Posted 22 June 2020 - 11:58 PM

My SO of 5 years knows because I made it clear before we even started dating. I realllly didn't want to deal with people entering my life in a serious manner/getting attached to each other without them being prepared to deal with me being weird with food, body issues, etc. He loved me anyway and somehow has never managed to do or say anything triggering. Bless him


  • wasteless likes this

 لا إله إلا الله محمد رسول الله


#16 PrinnyWinnie

PrinnyWinnie

    Advanced Warrior

  • Accountability access
  • PipPipPipPipPip
  • 441 posts
  • LocationPennsylvania

Posted 24 June 2020 - 05:47 AM

My husband knows and it’s a pain. He constantly tries to get me to eat and we argue a lot over calories and me not eating his dinners. He doesn’t want me to lose more weight and it’s just plain annoying. I know it probably comes out of concern for my well being, but he’s also very controlling, so I think the fact that I have the control over my eating makes him uncomfortable.

#17 sackobeans

sackobeans

    Sage

  • Accountability access
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 1022 posts
  • LocationOl' Dusty Hills

Posted 24 June 2020 - 03:57 PM

My fiance knows about my past with it (from before we met), but not about my recent relapse. I'm able to hide it pretty well through OMAD, plus saying "it's just until my dress fitting!!1!!" but if he knew how much I was restricting he'd be concerned. I feel terrible hiding it from him, but I just keep telling myself I'll get to my goal weight and maintain and he'll never know...



#18 Demmi

Demmi

    Advanced Warrior

  • Accountability access
  • PipPipPipPipPip
  • 472 posts

Posted 25 June 2020 - 04:02 AM

My fiancé knew about my ED past then I relapsed and told him after working up the courage for a month.

 

nothing has changed lol he doesn’t understand the disorder at all so I continue to spiral. I realised after telling I wasn’t ready for recovery anyway.


Relapsed 29 April 2020 ✨tumblr_m1ikpbOQnc1qbpdcto1_500.gif

 


#19 brokenangle

brokenangle

    Advanced Guru

  • Accountability access
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 894 posts
  • LocationIndiana, USA

Posted 25 June 2020 - 09:26 AM

My s/o knows somewhat.

We've been dating for something like 8 mo, but we've been friends for 6 years and actually dated when we first met. So hes seen me sobbing on the bed over a milkshake before! Rough days.

He doesn't know how strong it's back. I'm sure he suspects. But I try to do all my eating in front of him so he worries less. He just disapproves of fasting. Which is a pain, because I love fasting. But if I work with his minimum.... he usually doesn't complain. And I know I've got 20lbs easy before he worries.

Sent from my SM-G965U using Tapatalk
I am so sorry! I had no idea my signature was insanely long.
I forgot I wrote that.

#20 xshanlillie

xshanlillie

    Advanced Guru

  • Accountability access
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 670 posts

Posted 06 July 2020 - 05:25 AM

My bf doesn't have a clue

HW: 120 Ibs
LW: 99Ibs
CW: 109Ibs
GW: 90 Ibs
UGW: 85Ibs
tumblr_m4hhyrILCs1ro0pb3.gif



0 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 0 guests, 0 anonymous users