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How do y’all feel about the younger Ana crowd now that you’re older?


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#1 Oyster.kisses

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Posted 07 August 2020 - 06:39 AM

I accidentally posted this in the competitions forum , oops , I thought I was in this forum, it’s too early lol 😆


Don’t get me wrong, I love my groups and I don’t discriminate against Any particular age, however i have nothing in common with the younger thinspo crowd aside from sharing an Ed. I always feel like the Ana mom of the group bc I’m in my thirties. Sometimes I feel like I’m setting a bad example Does anyone else feel the same or can relate? Penny for your thoughts 💭 would love to hear what u guys think.

I’m looking to meet others in my age range to get to know and form friendships with, if you are interested feel free to come chat with me :

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#2 isabel clavicle

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Posted 07 August 2020 - 08:43 AM

i'm 38 and i don't feel like i fit in at all. i'd love to add you. 


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#3 Avivasdiscardedleg

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Posted 07 August 2020 - 10:05 AM

Yeah I don’t fit into the younger group and reading some things from the younger crowd just puts me back to when I was at that age at my most ill. For me it’s less of a feeling that the younger crowd are different now and more of an uncomfortable nostalgia of being where they are, only having to worry about fasting, parents and school and making it something that took up every waking moment for me.

Ive never really been into mutuals/buddies or meanspo so ed twitter goes completely over my head!
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#4 pinkyfrilly

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Posted 07 August 2020 - 11:23 AM

I definitely feel the same. every now and then I delete my account on here cause I feel dumb "hanging out" with people who are soooo much younger. I like having a sense of community so I keep coming back lol


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#5 Achelois

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Posted 08 August 2020 - 08:48 AM

I like the sense of community, but there are conversations I don't belong in.

 

I like reading posts from people with a different perspective/experiences.  For instance there was one person who talked about stealing cars.  How she got into it, what she looked for, etcetera.  It was an interesting read.  Maybe not an age issue with that, but it just speaks to having a good mixed group.

 

I have teenage daughters and one in particular is questioning her sexuality.  I have no experience with this, so I posted in the LGBT forum and asked for advice/perspective.  I got good feedback from people in her age group on this.  This is such a sensitive subject that getting candid feedback from people wanting to help is difficult.


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#6 Thegymbum

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Posted 08 August 2020 - 02:11 PM

Same here!! I still come on here when I’m feeling down/alone in my ed/in a really bad place ED wise, I guess especially lately with pandemic shit since since I’ve been more alone with everywhere closed and nothing interesting going on in my life and on and working from home, ha. Yet when I do browse the forum, I’m usually so disillusioned by the feeling of everyone being young and naive and early in their EDs dealing with shit like hiding their EDs from their parents or stuff with school etc. There’s just a major disconnect from the age difference. It’s not everyone, there are mature younger folks capable of thinking deeper and struggling with serious issues and issues common to anyone with an ed, but so much more so as time goes on, it’s harder to relate.

I’m always glad to feel the camaraderie of the 30+ forum and really should spend more of my time on here vs other boards lol. In particular, shit like people starting posts with “ya boiioiii” and other hip expressions that kids today use that weren’t around when we were under 30, ha. I can’t help but roll my eyes with cynicism when I read stuff, when though I know I was a naive teenager once and probably went through something similR 20 years ago.

They say with age comes cynicism, though... I suppose there’s more truth to that than I could’ve known 10 years ago!

Thanks for the relatable post. Glad you guys are around here to provide support and comfort and relatability!
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#7 AmethystAna

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Posted 08 August 2020 - 10:20 PM

Same feelings. I also don’t want to encourage any young people. I stay away from the anorexia forums in particular. I just wish they could see it doesn’t have to be this way. I was there when I was younger. I don’t even restrict as low because it is not necessary. But here are young people feeling the need to destroy their bodies and I hate it. I wish I could save them the trouble with my 25+ years experience.

Of course the struggles of hiding from parents and such don’t relate either.


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#8 nevven

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Posted 08 August 2020 - 11:10 PM

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#9 Oyster.kisses

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Posted 09 August 2020 - 05:26 AM

Mostly look down on them (yes I am an asshole and this is why I am childfree); having been in proana-ish forums when I was that age, I know most people are going through a shorter term crisis rather than full-blown ED and I wish they'd leave so that I can be a bad role model in peace.

Semi-kidding. I know they are savvier than my generation was at their age, and I'm often impressed by the logic and open-mindedness that I see these days.


Omg that’s so true tho
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#10 headology

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Posted 09 August 2020 - 07:31 AM

Depends on my mood and also age is not everything obviously. In some ways I think I'm more tolerant than I was at say 25. I find myself wishing there was a way to really get through to them how easy it is to lose so much of your life and hopes and dreams to this. I don't think there is though. I think if someone had told me back when I was 10 or 20 years younger I might have believed them but I would have thought "that won't happen to me" or that I could stop myself before I got to a certain point. I often find myself wanting to tell someone to "listen to your parents!" "go to school!" "eat your vegetables!" haha. It's hard to relate because I feel semi protective/responsible or something towards them.


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#11 Triplesso

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Posted 09 August 2020 - 07:51 AM

I feel like a lot of them are annoyingly overdramatic posting things like "omg I just RUINED EVERYTHING!!!!! I was supposed to fast today but I just ate like 5 grapes!!!!! WHY AM I SUCH A DISGUSTING PIG???? *welp* :("
Stuff like that and I do not understand the obsession with youtubers and instagram people.
Like i just can't understand how they worship them soo and how they are so connected with everything.

I mean i know it is an age thing im sure if I looked back at my ED posts from back in the day I probably spoke the same and I guess there were people i was obsessed with. But i dinno I just feel a lot of it is really pointless....

(Fully aware how much this post makes me sound like an old person shaking their fists telling kids to get off their lawn)
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#12 Rosechocolat

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Posted 18 August 2020 - 10:24 AM

I often find myself relating to something they're talking about.. but then I'll stop myself replying, because I'm an adult and I don't want to be encouraging them or accidently giving them tips etc. There's probably a lot of stuff we do and have done, that they haven't come across yet.. even though when I was 20, I was probably talking to people in their 30-40s and not realising it... it's possible they passed some behaviours on to me, that I could have done without!

 

I try to stick with my own age crowd, although because I'm in my 30s and don't have, and don't want to have children, I again find myself standing on the outside unable to relate to the majority of stuff being talked about.

 

 


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#13 Rosechocolat

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Posted 18 August 2020 - 10:29 AM

Yeah I don’t fit into the younger group and reading some things from the younger crowd just puts me back to when I was at that age at my most ill. For me it’s less of a feeling that the younger crowd are different now and more of an uncomfortable nostalgia of being where they are, only having to worry about fasting, parents and school and making it something that took up every waking moment for me.

Ive never really been into mutuals/buddies or meanspo so ed twitter goes completely over my head!

I can relate to this feeling.. and weirdly, alongside the uncomfortable nostalgia, there is a very warm nostagia where I miss the days I'd spend zoned out (too weak/dizzy when I'd stand to really do anything) watching Nickelodeon snuggled up on the sofa by the fire, and nibbling on a couple of doritos to get me through.. thinking about how skinny I was getting.. and how my outfit would look when I next met up with my friends.


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#14 NinjaWorm

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Posted 18 August 2020 - 11:39 PM

someone mentioned that it seems they are overdramatic and that so many are short term. I think that is how I feel. It isn't that it isn't a genuine issue, I just think it IS a fad in some circles, whether it's ig, youtube, whatever.

I mean even when I was a teenager I had a friend who tried it...she starved and purged and lost weight and her parents freaked and she freaked and then poof. Ed gone! she did it to compete with me...not bc she felt what i felt. I struggle to know who is genuine sometimes.

I am lonely in my ed. I talk to whomever honestly. some of my greatest supports who helped me choose to stay alive were in their 30s when I was a teenager...and they were sick as hell.
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#15 Jlynn82

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Posted 20 August 2020 - 10:26 AM

I feel the same. I lurk around in the general groups just because they get more traffic, but I definitely feel like I don't belong and try to be mindful that I am not encouraging anyone. When I do respond to a thread, it's more because I feel like I'm giving advice, which is maybe narcissistic of me haha. But there are definitely threads where I feel like I don't belong and often I want to pipe up and say "what are you even doing!!!" but I don't because I also don't want to seem like this weird creep who is in her late 30s and hanging out on an ED site with teenagers... sigh.


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#16 excitedcookie

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Posted 20 August 2020 - 01:13 PM

I'd love an invite. 30 here.

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#17 pinkyfrilly

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Posted 20 August 2020 - 06:49 PM

looks like the invite link expired, can we get a new one? 



#18 AmethystAna

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Posted 20 August 2020 - 10:49 PM

Having trouble finding you on discord. Please send an invite


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#19 acidicthroatgland

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Posted 23 August 2020 - 06:14 PM

34 here! Please pm me the link


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#20 maigrir237

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Posted 24 August 2020 - 11:29 PM

It is surreal to be back here at 35. When I was young I remember looking at people in their 30's returning to their EDs, thinking how pathetic that was. Now that is me; older, fatter, with a lot less excuses and a lot more reasons. 

 

I have to laugh when I see their posts about trying to hide it from  their parents etc. My mother moved in with me several years ago - now she is the one living under my roof. 


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