I keep messing up... I haven't gained though, just plateaued. However, I notice the disgusting bloat. I need to reject this disgusting retained water and find myself at my first goal weight that I listed for this diet. It is so difficult to continue because I am very paced but then can not stop once I see my friends' faces. I don't know why they remind me of food. I don't like how my body betrays me and finds its way to the kitchen when it is night time.
I am moving away from the SGD for now.
Here is my plan that I know will work because of the way my schedule looks:
- 10/31/20 >> BINGE DANGER TERRITORY!!! Halloween party at my friends' place. My tactic will be to eat only one snack and act like I am sick and leave. I can complete this when I commit myself to it before entering her place. GOAL INTAKE >> 500 kcal
- 11/01/20 >> BINGE DANGER TERRITORY!!! Another similar event. My tactic this time is to BRING GUM and mention that I felt sick the day before. My friend who hosted the Halloween party will be coming with me to vouch. GOAL INTAKE >> 500 kcal
- 11/02/20 >> STUDY DAY. The only binge danger will be my own food at my apartment. To avoid this binge, I will place all the food from my room to the communal cabinet, closest to the housemate that I do not like talking to/seeing. I will add signs and more signs all over my room to remind myself to live in my research study and my music study. GOAL INTAKE >> 0 kcal
- 11/03/20 >> BREEZE DAY. Course work on top of course work. Piles of it all. Meetings. Vote Day. No time for food but more time for sleep. GOAL INTAKE >> 0 kcal
- 11/04/20 >> STUDY DAY. Work as much as possible on my exams and projects. Will need to complete this all in order for me to be able to go back to my job and make money. I took a two week break to catch my breath and understand what the heck is going on in this chaotic environment and time period. Now, it is time to focus on getting myself to where I need to be and where I am meant to be. GOAL INTAKE >> 0 kcal
- 11/05/20 >> same as above. GOAL INTAKE >> 0 kcal. I will not be allowing myself to speak to any friends. Live in the grind and in the arts. Lock my door.
- 11/06/20 >> Doctor's appointment. GOAL INTAKE >> 250 kcal