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Feeling fatter the more weight you lose


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#1 DistressedOrange

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Posted 30 November 2020 - 01:59 AM

I'm seriously going crazy

I wake up every morning feeling super bloated and TERRIFIED of my weight. I'm not even actually bloated, I just feel bloated and fat and I don't even get the morning skinny thing anymore. Like wtf? I'm at my LW but I've never felt bigger. I'm small and simultaneously huuuge and I'm always convinced I've gained like 3kg since my last weigh in

Ugh
  • gorls, Fitskiny, stkitty and 1 other like this
"It's a very Greek idea, and a very profound one.

Beauty is terror.

Whatever we call beautiful, we quiver before it. And what could be more terrifying and beautiful, to souls like the Greeks or our own, than to lose control completely?"

-Donna Tartt, The Secret History

Click click for ~lyrics~

Spoiler


Accountability:

https://www.myproana...key-yes-really/

Body chek
https://www.myproana...ve-body-checks/

157cm/5'2"

Yikes

#2 whatsthename

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Posted 30 November 2020 - 02:06 AM

yep.... it's like the honeymoon period is over and everything just sucks lol


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#3 The Flower of Carnage

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Posted 30 November 2020 - 02:37 AM

Thats how I feel all day everyday, and at my lowest I felt huger than ever. This is what keeps us so damn stuck.


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Lowest BMI: 10.9

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Current BMI: 12's

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#4 DistressedOrange

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Posted 30 November 2020 - 02:58 AM

Thats how I feel all day everyday, and at my lowest I felt huger than ever. This is what keeps us so damn stuck.



Right?? I've been restricting for a while and my hunger has been spiking lately, yet I feel the need to lose way more instead of just maintaining as was originally the plan. This sucks so much. Why would anyone want this?
  • Fitskiny and Lightningbolt like this
"It's a very Greek idea, and a very profound one.

Beauty is terror.

Whatever we call beautiful, we quiver before it. And what could be more terrifying and beautiful, to souls like the Greeks or our own, than to lose control completely?"

-Donna Tartt, The Secret History

Click click for ~lyrics~

Spoiler


Accountability:

https://www.myproana...key-yes-really/

Body chek
https://www.myproana...ve-body-checks/

157cm/5'2"

Yikes

#5 FragmentsOfHer

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Posted 30 November 2020 - 03:05 AM

I get this. The more weight I lose the more I feel ashamed and self conscious. I worry that others think I'm huge and are staring at me, judging me. The numbers on the scale don't correlate with the image I see in the mirror. The numbers say underweight but I still see fat everywhere I look, in every area of my body.
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Anorexia Nervosa, PTSD, Depression, Anxiety

It is during our darkest moments that we must focus to see the light.
(Aristotle)

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#6 Lightningbolt

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Posted 30 November 2020 - 03:45 AM

Right?? I've been restricting for a while and my hunger has been spiking lately, yet I feel the need to lose way more instead of just maintaining as was originally the plan. This sucks so much. Why would anyone want this?


Bro this is exactly how I feel lately, hungrier than before. I’ve increased my calories by 30 (low ik, but that all I can currently manage) to 1130.

Now I’m like, okay clearly I’m hungrier and eating more food which means I need to lose more even though I’m starting to borderline scare people with how I look (ppl that care about me). I can be ip through the ER (the ER dr would possibly be able to with family pressure) if I lose like 3-5 more pounds.

I might need to be put on antibiotics for a UTI and I’d have to tell them my approx weight but I’d have to lie or else they’d probs ring alarm bells but my dumbass wants to keep losing weight. Like I’m not low enough anymore but I’m starting to feel weaker and I don’t feel at a low weight anymore and it just goes in an absolute endless cycle

and thank you for listening to my TEDx talk about one of the many reasons I hate my ed.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
  • loony26 likes this
Height: 5’2 Female CW: 79.6lbs HW: 104lbs LW: 79.6lbs GW: 85lbs✔️ GW: 83lbs✔️/82✔️/80✔️ /idk and will hopefully maintain soon????

#7 troglodyte

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Posted 30 November 2020 - 04:01 AM

I have no science or facts to back this up, but I think my body composition is weird for a while after I lose weight. Like I feel more flabby and bloated, especially around the stomach. Maybe the body needs some time to readjust?

Recently, I lost 2 inches around the waist but only 1 inch around the stomach. So even though I've become smaller, my stomach to waist ratio is worse. I think it makes me look bigger.
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#8 Ghost in the Machine

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Posted 30 November 2020 - 06:02 AM

That’s standard, when I was BMI 20-21 I felt amazing, at 17.5 I feel huge. I had a crush on someone and logically it makes no sense but I’m convinced he wasn’t interested because I’m too big
  • skinnydreams2212 likes this
Stuck on the AN bus since 2012

CW: 99lbs

#9 Alycat

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Posted 30 November 2020 - 06:02 AM

I definitely think what I see in the mirror has no correlation with my actual weight. I just look the same as I did when I was five stone heavier. It makes it very difficult to actually know whether I look fat or not to others.


  • freakforthin1 and skinnydreams2212 like this

HW: 118kg

CW: 81.95kg

Goals: 85kg, 80kg, 75kg, 70kg, 65kg, 60kg, 55kg, 50kg


#10 little bunny

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Posted 30 November 2020 - 06:06 AM

Idk, the thing is, I’ll lose weight according to my scale, but I still look fat in the mirror. That’s body dysmorphia for ya

#11 Banana__Milk

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Posted 30 November 2020 - 06:21 AM

Yeah. I honestly think it’s because my body SHAPE, doesn’t change. Like I’m still the same proportionally, so I have less inches around but still hate my body 😣

#12 skinnydreams2212

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Posted 30 November 2020 - 07:11 AM

I definitely felt less fat and hated myself alot less before I relapsed... fml

#13 DistressedOrange

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Posted 30 November 2020 - 07:40 AM

Yeah. I honestly think it’s because my body SHAPE, doesn’t change. Like I’m still the same proportionally, so I have less inches around but still hate my body


Omg this! My body shape is no hips or bust so my waist is nonexistent, yet HUGE THIGHS. MASSIVE THIGHS. Proportionally my thighs carry literally lost of my weight yet my hips are narrow as fuck. Why???
"It's a very Greek idea, and a very profound one.

Beauty is terror.

Whatever we call beautiful, we quiver before it. And what could be more terrifying and beautiful, to souls like the Greeks or our own, than to lose control completely?"

-Donna Tartt, The Secret History

Click click for ~lyrics~

Spoiler


Accountability:

https://www.myproana...key-yes-really/

Body chek
https://www.myproana...ve-body-checks/

157cm/5'2"

Yikes

#14 stonemilker

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Posted 30 November 2020 - 11:37 AM

yeah, i keep trying to tell myself maybe its bdd, but it doesnt matter when i feel that im 15lbs heavier than the scale says and i can feel fat all over. and when i body check it just looks like the photos are showing me get fatter and fatter each day but the scale doesnt reflect it.

like im fully convinced that im gaining fat every day and it makes me so scared to step on the scale even though im lowering my intake and fasting a lot.
5'8.7" // 89.6 lbs // vegan

#15 tove lo

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Posted 30 November 2020 - 12:25 PM

Sorry to hijack this thread but my dysmorphia has been bad lately - are any of you on medication directly linked to your body dysmorphia? I take Effexor for my depression and go through periods of time where I'm on mood stabilizers and antipsychotics but none really have ever helped with my body dysmorphia

#16 LittleChefRémy07

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Posted 30 November 2020 - 12:30 PM

M O O D ><

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#17 shannie

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Posted 30 November 2020 - 12:41 PM

I know from experience It’s horrible and an awful way to live. I’m so sorry you’re experiencing this xo
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#18 the cure

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Posted 30 November 2020 - 12:44 PM

yesss, i felt fattest at like 120 lb, which was like my lowest weight this year. and i felt so anxious and nervous all the time, i couldn't really believe it and still felt fat. and i still felt like i looked the same even with -10 lb weight loss. then i gained some back and still feel like shit. 


sw - 130 lb // cw - 125 lb // lw - 120 lb

 

height: 5'7

gw 1 - 125 lb // bmi 19.6

gw 2 - 120 lb // bmi - 18.8

gw 3 - 115 lb // bmi - 18

ugw - 110 lb // bmi - 17.2

 

125 124 123 122 121 

120 119 118 117 116 

115 114 113 112 111

110

 

 

i don't care if it hurts

i wanna have control

i want a perfect body

i want a perfect soul

 

 

 

 


#19 louisvuittonblonde

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Posted 30 November 2020 - 12:51 PM

well, just think .. you could be actually fat and feeling fat which is way worse than being skinny and feeling fat

 

perspective? 

I'm seriously going crazy

I wake up every morning feeling super bloated and TERRIFIED of my weight. I'm not even actually bloated, I just feel bloated and fat and I don't even get the morning skinny thing anymore. Like wtf? I'm at my LW but I've never felt bigger. I'm small and simultaneously huuuge and I'm always convinced I've gained like 3kg since my last weigh in

Ugh


<p>


#20 Fitskiny

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Posted 30 November 2020 - 12:53 PM

I'm seriously going crazy

I wake up every morning feeling super bloated and TERRIFIED of my weight. I'm not even actually bloated, I just feel bloated and fat and I don't even get the morning skinny thing anymore. Like wtf? I'm at my LW but I've never felt bigger. I'm small and simultaneously huuuge and I'm always convinced I've gained like 3kg since my last weigh in

Ugh

omg yes. why does our brain do this? 


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