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Me again, opinions pls


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6 replies to this topic

#1 Mockingbird9

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Posted 05 December 2020 - 10:23 AM

So I wrote this shitty something that’s related to my ED .. and (last time hopefully) I’d love to get some feedback on it. Thanks and stay safe y’all.

——

I am an addict
And there is no exaggerating
When I say that
I am my heroin

My head lies in the clouds
Living comfortably off the high
Until they find me
A pale blue debilitated leftover of a human

You see, coming down and
Stepping in and out of this body
Is exhausting

I have been here before
Trying to let go of it while
Losing my sense of self and
Running as fast as I can
Without looking back
To check if i'm still being haunted

The ride
Is like cutting both of my arms off
And once I’m done
My limbs would regenerate
And I have to reach out for the saw
Over and over again

~L
  • TurtleBurger likes this

Height: 4'11"

HW: 49 kg

LW: 30.3 kg

CW: 33.6 (probably gaining..)

GW: Sick. dead. nonexistence.

 


#2 mydailythinspo

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Posted 05 December 2020 - 08:40 PM

I feel this. This is exactly what my ED feels like. 💕
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#3 TheHumanStick

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Posted 09 December 2020 - 09:15 AM

very nice!!


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5"4.5

CW - 112

UGW - 85

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#4 someweirdthing

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Posted 11 December 2020 - 02:52 AM

Ok I never even post here but i LOVE the first 4 lines + the "coming down and / stepping in and out of this body" idk idk


  • Mockingbird9 and snow light like this

G

He/she/they

5'3 - hw 170 - lw 117 - cw 130
 

Soft spoken with a broken jaw

Step outside but not to brawl

Autumn's sweet, we call it fall

I'll make it to the moon if I have to crawl


#5 easymind

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Posted 18 December 2020 - 07:52 PM

hey! i some general constructive criticism for this piece if you still want it? i'll put it under spoiler in case you don't and just want to ignore me.

 

Spoiler


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#6 TurtleBurger

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Posted 03 May 2021 - 09:34 AM

this is beautiful <3 it absolutely captures how horrendous eating disorder can be


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#7 Mockingbird9

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Posted 24 May 2021 - 06:31 AM

Thank you all for the lovely replies

Height: 4'11"

HW: 49 kg

LW: 30.3 kg

CW: 33.6 (probably gaining..)

GW: Sick. dead. nonexistence.

 



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