I hope covid doesn't keep me away from moving back to university on the 4th January because I have a lot of self-destructive habits to cath up on. I also want to reach my gw by my birthday in February.
same. I need college asap. I went thru this fake recovery upon moving home bc I wrekt my semester getting too caught up in my ed. But who learns from that right?! I gained a ton of weight in “pursuit of recovery” and just functioning robotically, doing “what i need to do” to satisfy my family then quickly realized gaining weight doesn’t heal the brain, nothing does, and I am still me! I am starting to drop all the recovery weight and everyone still thinks that “things are getting better!” & “every meal is getting easier!” but now my appearance is starting to not align significantly. I move back in 2 weeks and now I’m in this weird split where honestly maintaining gets them off my back for the semester because I leave “while doing well”. people worry less, ask me less, etc. they all love me and want the best, but they don’t understand an inch of eating disorders. and they’re all gullible af. anyways then I can SEND IT once I’m back but also how does one just sit happily in maintenance and not act on ED behaviors during the fucking holidays ?¿