Hello! I'm a trans male with pretty small minded parents, so I think I get where you're coming from. I was able to cut my hair pretty short when i was about 15 because I had always been a slightly alternative/goth kid, and my mum was pretty goth too, so i got to have a fairly androgynous haircut. I haven't been able to come out to my family though, they're all a bit trans/homophobic just because they don't know any better and were raised in a time when all that stuff was normal and seen as okay.
My ed came in part from the fact that i was always super skinny as a young kid, up until age 12-13, and i just wanted that skinny and lanky look back since thats still how I see myself in my head; long and lanky and bony.
I haven't been in the ed community long, I only came across this forum about a week ago at most, so I'm curious to see what it's like for other trans folk here