I'm worried my boyfriend may have this. - ARFID - Forums and Community

Jump to content

About MPA

MPA is a site dedicated to the support or recovery of those suffering from eating disorders or body dysmorphic disorders. Please be sensitive to this fact when creating an account and contributing to the board.


I'm worried my boyfriend may have this.

5 replies to this topic

#1 Little Princess

Little Princess

    Advanced Warrior

  • Accountability access
  • PipPipPipPipPip
  • 262 posts

Posted 16 February 2021 - 03:29 AM

So, my lovely partner, the light of my life, is a terribly, terribly picky eater. There are so many foods that he doesn't like, that I've started keeping a list so that I can plan our meals/where to order takeout better because otherwise I'm sure I'd forget some foods he doesn't like. And they're all pretty much texture issues, for example:
"I hate mac and cheese, the noodles are nashy (sp?) in my mouth."

Actually, he describes a lot of foods as "nashy", and I'm not entirely sure what it means, but it makes sense to him.


We're both vegetarian, and he's lactose intolerant, though he still eats cheese on a regular (almost daily) basis. His limited diet is super carb heavy- I've joked that he's picky about all the "wrong" foods, that is, he eschews so many healthy foods, but flocks to processed things like cereal, pop tarts, eggo waffles, etc. he loves pizza, french toast, and breakfast foods. On one hand he says he's "proudly picky", but then he also seems embarrassed about his pickiness when we're around other people or if I mention it.


He's juuuust over the edge of being a normal weight, and isn't afraid of gaining- to the contrary, at the beginning of January he wanted to gain 15 lbs and lift weights to build muscle, but after about 2 days he found counting calories to be too much work and stopped. I'm worried he's anemic (iron and/or B12), which I know is rarer in guys but he doesn't eat many veggies and especially lately he's been complaining of feeling cold all the time, even when he's laying in bed wearing a long sleeve shirt and covered with a fuzzy blanket AND a weighted blanket.


What do y'all think? Does it sound like he has ARFID? How can I help him?

  • skellyjelly and stkitty like this

#2 comfy-target2


    Advanced Guru

  • Accountability access
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 582 posts
  • LocationSydney

Posted 16 February 2021 - 03:41 AM

That is really nice of you to observe and take notes and be concerned on what's happening. And yes, maybe u can try foods high in iron? I can only think of red-meats but i know yall are vegetarians. u can try using the veggies high in iron and make it like a soup? or stew (or is this too "nashy"?) if all else fails, try asking the doc from a clinic about ur concerns for him?

  • Melancholic Doll likes this

Height: 155 cm

HW: 62 kg

CW: 53.2 kg

LW: 45 kg

GW: 38 kg

#3 gilgi



  • Accountability access
  • PipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 533 posts

Posted 16 February 2021 - 03:47 AM

its really supportive of you that you pay attention to his struggles even if he tries to diminish them!

i think getting him to take a b12 and iron supplement would be a good start, vegetarians and vegans are recommended to supplement b12 anyways. im not sure how to help with his eating struggles though, im afraid i dont have any experience with arfid/extreme picky eaters

Gesendet von meinem SM-A520F mit Tapatalk

#4 キラキラ



  • Accountability access
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 3253 posts
  • Location♪ I come from the Land Down Under ♪

Posted 16 February 2021 - 03:58 AM

It's so nice that you care so much for him and are trying to help him through his struggles.

If it's a texture issue maybe try more crunchy type foods? It seems a lot of the stuff he likes have this quality? (cereal, pop tarts etc.)

If he starts on iron supplements and finds they are too harsh on his stomach you could suggest liquid iron supplements :)






#5 skellyjelly


    Advanced Warrior

  • Accountability access
  • PipPipPipPipPip
  • 429 posts

Posted 16 February 2021 - 04:19 AM

How does he feel about these foods?

Although you absorb less of the iron in plants, every bite counts, and adding a source of vitamin C to vegetarian sources of iron will enhance absorption. Some of the best plant sources of iron are:

Beans and lentils
Baked potatoes
Dark green leafy vegetables such as spinach
Fortified breakfast cereals
Whole-grain and enriched breads

Like others have said, iron supplements can be hard on your stomach so anything he can fit into his diet helps.
And do you guys use nutritional yeast? That can help add B12 to his diet too.

He should really see a doctor to get a blood test so you know what he might be deficient in though. It's super sweet of you to work this hard to accommodate his needs. Thank you for caring for him
SW: 144 | CW:~125 | GW: 111

I am a skeleton trapped in gelatin please free me

#6 Little Princess

Little Princess

    Advanced Warrior

  • Accountability access
  • PipPipPipPipPip
  • 262 posts

Posted 16 February 2021 - 09:30 PM

Thanks for all the replies you guys!

I think this was the nudge I needed to going to encourage him to go to his doctor to get labs done for iron, because it seems like his usual issues with feeling tired all the time and feeling cold when I don't feel cold have gotten worse (though it is winter). I'd never tell someone to start iron pills without getting a level, because the dose you need can be different depending on how low you are, and follow-up labs are important. When someone has iron-deficiency anemia, they don't have to take iron tablets forever, usually just for 3-6 months.

Nutritional yeast is a good idea- I've never actually used it myself but I have had things made with it and enjoyed it. When I first brought up concerns about iron-deficiency anemia, he insisted he was fine due to eating cereal almost every day.

Reply to this topic


0 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 0 guests, 0 anonymous users