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Thing's that triggered you today?


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#61 starvingartistx

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Posted 24 February 2021 - 03:20 AM

Also, sitting in class and the swivel chair I was sitting on kept creaking. I think its because of how huge I am - no one elses chairs were creaking. I hate myself so fucking much.


17 ~ they/she 

 

Height: 156cm

CW: 42kg (BMI 17.3)

LW: 37.5kg

 

 

45   44   43   42    41   40   39   38   37   36   35   34   33   

 

 

I wish my weight was as low as my self esteem 


#62 BetaDecay

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Posted 24 February 2021 - 11:30 AM

Closing my eyes tight and being filled with dread and then bewildered misery as the number goes up on the scale every morning for the past 19 days despite consuming absolutely nothing apart from plain water, a single (21kcal) miso sachet for sodium, 500ml of pure coconut water for potassium (18kcal/100ml) and 4 sugar free multi vitamin supplements (20kcal/5each)

That is it per day. No cheating, no eating, no hidden calories. 131 calories. Every day my weight is a little higher and it’s torturing me. I feel utterly betrayed.

I am not an idiot. I understand that it is mathematically impossible for it to be fat-gain. Physics and the laws of thermodynamics preclude it.
I’m a scientist for god sake, I understand that it can only be glycogen stores or water retention from the salts but 19 days of gaining. 19. In a row.

My absolute faith in science and maths and iron willpower is all that’s tethering me to sanity rn, because my veneer of calm, rational woman of logic is cracking. And trust me, no-one, absolutely no-one wants to be near when a particle physicist has a meltdown.

We are not people who crack. We are not allowed to crack.

*Breathes deeply.

I’m going to go do some origami now.


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Just a little update on this hell-scape situation; it’s all ok.

The weight just fell back off. 3 pounds overnight for 2 days. 6 pounds gone in total. Just peed it out.

All water weight that my body mysteriously retained for 3 weeks. The only thing I can account for is that I switched brand of coconut water. The new one had 0.2g more sodium per 100ml than the old old, but 1 less calorie per 100ml.

At 500 ml per day to ensure my 1250mg minimum potassium intake, I was actually taking in closer to 2500mg potassium (which is a salt) throw in the 0.6g of sodium in the miso too, I had inadvertently doubled my salt intake. Hence the unfathomable weight gain.

I upped my water and it just fell straight off.

Never doubt maths and the laws of physics. They are infallible and do not lie.

I’m not sure if anyone else here is a scientist too, but all fats are simply lipids. Lipids are triacylglycerol

A tri-acetyl-glycerol is three long tails of carbon and hydrogen held together with three acetyl groups.

The body, in order to harness the energy in the lipid, has to break apart the covalent bond between he hydrogen and the carbon atom (this is also how petrol/gasoline works too...it’s just made of the bodies of liquified sea creatures instead of body fat. Same principle)

The carbon in your fat stores you actually breathe out as carbon dioxide in your breath (approx 10mg per breath. This is kinda how exercise works. The harder you are breathing the more fat you are burning) whilst using the hydrogen for fuel.

It’s a myth that fat is just ‘turned into energy’. That would go against the mass energy law of equivalence. Einstein himself could not circumvent these laws and nor can anything in the known universe.

If you are not cheating, nor is your body. You can’t gain fat in a deficit. No matter what the scale says. It is impossible. Literally, impossible. Some other unknown factor is there. All you have to do is find it.

I hope this puts some people’s mind at rest.

Love and kisses,

BetaDecay.

MSc. Elementary Particle physics.


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#63 themsads

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Posted 24 February 2021 - 12:03 PM

today around 4:30 i felt the tired you get from restricting for a long time even if ive been in this relapse for all of 3 days. i didn't eat because dinner was so soon but the fatigue was real and i immediately felt better after dinner lol

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☂HBMI 23.4 (110, 20.8☀LBMI 18.9



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