Obese family, poverty, toxic relationship. Never took care of my body and let it all slip.
How did you get fat?
Posted 15 March 2021 - 05:29 AM
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- TreatmentDidntWork likes this
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Posted 15 March 2021 - 08:17 AM
Stopped throwing up to stay out of treatment, didn't stop the binge eating that caused the throwing up to begin with.
Justice is no kind of love.
Posted 15 March 2021 - 10:39 AM
I lost both of my parents and the trauma caused me to binge eat.
Posted 15 March 2021 - 11:58 AM
Posted 15 March 2021 - 04:42 PM
i told myself i was recovering but i just switched from one ed to another, and after a year of binging I gained about 70lb
Posted 15 March 2021 - 06:35 PM
HW: 191 LW: 111 UGW: 98
Posted 15 March 2021 - 06:47 PM
Posted 16 March 2021 - 08:21 AM
I've always been overweight. My entire life. At one point I was just chunky because I was starving myself, but then I quit and now I have BED. So its far worse than it ever has been.
I think abuse I suffered as a kid and using food to self-soothe, mixed with my mental illness has really done a number on me.
Posted 16 March 2021 - 08:41 AM
I'm naturally higher BMI. That combined with trauma and lack of coping skills = food and body image/weight struggles.
Posted 26 March 2021 - 06:58 PM
The second time around ( a few years later) I had lost a lot of weight and my mum said I was too skinny and watched me eat until I was back to my highest weight.🙄
Posted 26 March 2021 - 09:30 PM
Age: 33 Height: 5'4 Highest: 240 Current: 204 (June 2021) Lowest: 139 Goal: 140 Ultimate Goal: 120
Posted 27 March 2021 - 07:58 PM
Posted 28 March 2021 - 10:55 AM
And undiagnosed anxiety and PTSD.....i only got diagnosed when I was old enough to make my own decisions.......I just knew something was wrong but my parents always believed I just needed to pray the feelings away.......I ate them away instead.
- 80sfilms likes this
Posted 28 March 2021 - 01:10 PM
What the frick, y'all, I'm such a lightweight compared to the mental hell you've gone through.
I never really got *fat*, just super close. But I have chronic anemia and it surfaced right after I finished growing. I was eating like I was still growing, but I wasn't, and I couldn't exercise cause I couldn't breathe when I ran.
Plus right then I got backstabbed by a friend- lost most of my friend group and little old church me didn't have another social group at the time. I can be an emotional eater, so I just stopped trying to be healthy for like six months. Borderline obese though not quite. :/
I've lost most of that weight but really want to get back to when I could run for hours and not even be tired. Good old days...
To the well-organized mind, death is but the next great adventure.
Posted 28 March 2021 - 01:55 PM
So I grew up without my parents around bc they were always working. my mom's cooking is the best hehe so I ate a lot as a kid, but I also used food to cope with loneliness ):
I remember I ate like 5 bags of chips and I was afraid my family would see so I flushed the empty bags down the toilet LOL (i kno i was dumb omg) and then this other time I was home alone for like 3 days straight but there was no cooked food so I ate bread with cheese and ketchup, followed by a pack of oreos to which I cried while eating :'( I was like 11-12 yrs???
I was active tho so I was skinny but then when HS came around, I did a lot of sports. however I didn't know how to properly nourish myself & ate a lot of junk so I was hungry often and ended up binging everyday after practice. I had this false belief that I wouldn't get fat bc I have "fast metabolism" lol
During this time I wasn't too chubby yet tho my BMI was normal. It was when I came to college that i got to my HW bc I went thru a tough breakup bc ex cheated on me with ex-best friend. I'd eat bc I was sad. It was the only way I knew to cope. then after seeing weight gain, I'd literally go out at like 2-3 AM for a run or to exercise in our gym room. then I'd restrict. then binge. it became a vicious cycle.
Posted 28 March 2021 - 02:09 PM
Finally back down to the 190s though and still going.
Posted 28 March 2021 - 02:38 PM
You know what, I was always around a size 10-12 (UK size, pretty average) and thought that was fat. Then it crept up to around size 12-14, still not too bad ...
Then 8 years ago I got pregnant. I was soooo sick throughout the pregnancy that I lost tonnes of weight, in fact I was the same weight at 9 months pregnant as I was when I got pregnant!! I was one of those really cool looking skinny pregnant women, big bump and big boobs and skinny everywhere else. Never got heavy or uncomfortable even when I went overdue.
Anyways childbirth resulted in major PTSD flashbacks of childhood sexual trauma bla bla bla. I had severe post-natal mental health issues, descended into addiction, my partner left me taking our baby, I became jobless, homeless, lost everything in my life, was more than ready to die, and nearly did many times ... I never stopped trying to get better though. I was in and out of psych wards and treatment centres.
And after a couple of very chaotic years, I finally turned things around in November 2017. A lot of things helped me get sober and stable, but adding Seroquel to my meds was a big gamechanger. However it also made me fat. Which is fine, I was happy to take the weight gain if it gave me my life back. And I did get almost everything back in recovery, I have my own apartment again, a great job and even my own small business starting up on the side, friends and family and all back in my life, and most importantly I have my son back with me. (He's between me and his dad, it works really well for us. Getting back with his dad was never on the cards, and that's fine, it wasn't a great relationship to begin with.)
Anyways I'm still on a fairly high dose of Seroquel, we've tried reducing it a few times but it's a no-go, my mental health goes super wobbly very quick. So I can stay on it and stay fat forever and blame the Seroquel .... or I can stay on it and choose to exercise some self-control over the choices I make, and actually lose the weight. So I'm gonna do the latter.
I'm now over 200lb and a UK size 18-20. I know that sounds massive, but I'd still advise anyone considering meds not to let potential weight gain affect your decision too much. Weight can be lost, mental stability is so precious and hard to attain. Get that sorted first, everything else will fall into place as it's meant to eventually.
- buzzlightyear and bellabird like this
Obese, Overweight, Normal, Underweight, Goal
Posted 28 March 2021 - 05:24 PM
Food-wise, it was complete lack of self-control when it came to not binging on junk (mainly chocolate). Exercise-wise, it was both lack of energy (partially due to depression and part due to stress/laziness) and an ongoing issue with my leg from overtraining years ago where it hurts after two or more days of workouts with any impact at all.
29 | F | 5'8"
SW: 175 |
GW1: 170 | GW2: 160 | GW3: 150 | GW4: 140 | GW5: 130
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Posted 28 March 2021 - 07:39 PM
I gained about 20 lbs. in middle school due to my medicine because of my bipolar depression. I was in the 150s - 160s and ended up in the 180s. Although I am 5'6, fat gets distributed to other places (thighs, butt and arms) so my stomach didn't appear big and I could still wear high waisted pants/skirts/shorts and still appear to have a relatively flat stomach. In the past 2 years that I've been in my relationship, I have gained 30 lbs. of ''happy weight''. Before, I would occasionally binge and purge and fail and emotionally eat which kept me at the same weight. I just wanted to be loved and called pretty and I guess it worked because I met my boyfriend. Now that I have him, I didn't care anymore about my appearance. A few months ago I noticed red stretch marks meaning I gained. Last July I was 199 and last week I was 210. I don't look ''bad'' according to other people but I feel like a whale. My boyfriend himself developed an eating disorder going from 225 lbs. to 126 lbs. in a year and a half. He used to weight 35 lbs. more and now he weighs 80 lbs. less than me. That also has influenced me. I want to be smaller. I want to be picked up. It's not fair and I want it to be fair.
♡ My lips are calorie free ♡
Rome wasn't built in a day... You will bloom soon, little flower.
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