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Does my collegue have an eating disorder?


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#1 Justmyself

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Posted 23 February 2021 - 01:13 PM

It happened to me yesterday at work to sit with my new collegue went to a bar i was just sitting and didnt order anything. Then he ordered one chocolate and one crossaint. I said to him that he has a good fitness since he expressed his concern that he didnt walk and said that he does a lot of sport. Then he started telling me all the steps he walks in a day and the number of calories he burns and that once every three days its possible to eat a croissant since he will not suffer from obesity he said very outloud in the bar i was so so embarassed there were people next to us to look very weird XD . I was like yeah ok i better not start because otherwise we are both gonna get kicked out of the bar. But anyway, maybe he doesnt have it but if he even told me one more detail i would seriously suspect he has an eating disorder

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#2 AnyaWW

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Posted 23 February 2021 - 01:26 PM

Honestly, it does sound like he at least has some tendencies.. Although I would say that as a person with an ED I tend to overanalyse these types of situations haha  :D

 

(Also, hello fellow finnish person!)



#3 Justmyself

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Posted 23 February 2021 - 01:30 PM

Honestly, it does sound like he at least has some tendencies.. Although I would say that as a person with an ED I tend to overanalyse these types of situations haha  :D
 
(Also, hello fellow finnish person!)

yeah me too as someone with an eating disorder i have some kind of ed radr and tend to anaylyze a bit ahahah. Moikka!
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HW: 60KG. - LW: 48KG. - CW:51KG.

166cm.

GW:50kg.

UGW: 49kg.

 

I used to think of hunger as the pain, before I got to know recovery.


#4 Kayngel

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Posted 23 February 2021 - 02:28 PM

I feel like the popularity and easy access to a lot of weight loss and “health” youtubers and influencers have influenced people without EDs to think and talk like this. It sounds to me like he’s just watched one too many of the YouTube influencers because that’s exactly what they spout. I’m honestly so sick of them and their misguided harmful “facts and advice”
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#5 I'm a black rainbow

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Posted 23 February 2021 - 02:34 PM

🖐 a wave to all the people coming here to anxiously check if it's one of your coworkers talking about you
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#6 I'm a black rainbow

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Posted 23 February 2021 - 02:38 PM

I agree with the the replies that as people with eds, we are hyper aware of disordered behavior. Does he have an eating disorder? Maybe, and maybe not. But that IS disordered behavior. It could very well lead to an eating disorder, so... he's in a risky situation, if he isn't in the thick of it already.
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#7 I'm a black rainbow

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Posted 23 February 2021 - 02:38 PM

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#8 tutifruitibooti

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Posted 23 February 2021 - 04:35 PM

I wonder if maybe he recovered from being overweight or having BED and that's why he takes pride in being able to eat a croissant and not become obese. Obesity isn't really something people throw around often, usually it's just more generic being fat or overweight. Obese sounds very specific somehow?


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#9 sacrosanctmoth

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Posted 23 February 2021 - 04:47 PM

My first thought was also that he might have been obese or something in the past so he had to highlight it for mostly himself that he got the right to ordering those foods. Definitely a little bit weird Ed wise.
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#10 escapingreality

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Posted 23 February 2021 - 05:48 PM

i do think he is perhaps just a bit too hyper-focused on not becoming obese, or perhaps he had been at an "undesirably" high weight prior to weight loss, and these tendencies could be the start of an ED for him, but it's so hard to tell because almost everyone has a not-so-perfect relationship with food.


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#11 jpi332

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Posted 23 February 2021 - 10:05 PM

I agree with the the replies that as people with eds, we are hyper aware of disordered behavior. Does he have an eating disorder? Maybe, and maybe not. But that IS disordered behavior. It could very well lead to an eating disorder, so... he's in a risky situation, if he isn't in the thick of it already.

Do you think it is disordered? I mean if he had a fitbit watch he could probably easily know the amount of steps he took and cals he burned. Alot of people I know have that watch and try to get in a certain amount of steps, and it doesn't seem inherently disordered.


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#12 jpi332

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Posted 23 February 2021 - 10:08 PM

that once every three days its possible to eat a croissant since he will not suffer from obesity

Someone else mentioned that it's unusual to say obesity instead of fat like most people would say, since obesity is more of a specific medical condition. But I saw that you were Finnish. Was your conversation in a different language? If so, could the word he used be more translatable to fat than to obesity? 


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#13 snowqueenxx

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Posted 23 February 2021 - 10:09 PM

He sounds that he has disordered eating at the very least.

#14 jpi332

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Posted 23 February 2021 - 10:13 PM

He sounds that he has disordered eating at the very least.

what do you think disordered eating is considered? I knew one kid who wanted to eat 1500 cals a day and I think he exercised 4 hrs a day although I'm probably remembering that wrong, as that would mean he would have had to be exercising whenever he was out of school. But I don't think he actually did that, as he did end up getting stuff to eat alot relatively spontaneously, and was at larger end size wise and was aiming for a healthy weight.


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#15 Justmyself

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Posted 24 February 2021 - 04:59 AM

Someone else mentioned that it's unusual to say obesity instead of fat like most people would say, since obesity is more of a specific medical condition. But I saw that you were Finnish. Was your conversation in a different language? If so, could the word he used be more translatable to fat than to obesity?

it was in finnish yea, he said "lihavuus" was the problem he was concerned about and explained me how it was ok for him to take the taxi instead of walking because he did a lot of sport XD dont worry about it it just never happened to me to talk to a person almost as obsessed as me about calories , weight and exercise so i suspected he has an ED

HW: 60KG. - LW: 48KG. - CW:51KG.

166cm.

GW:50kg.

UGW: 49kg.

 

I used to think of hunger as the pain, before I got to know recovery.


#16 I'm a black rainbow

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Posted 24 February 2021 - 08:31 AM

Do you think it is disordered? I mean if he had a fitbit watch he could probably easily know the amount of steps he took and cals he burned. Alot of people I know have that watch and try to get in a certain amount of steps, and it doesn't seem inherently disordered.


Do you think it is disordered? I mean if he had a fitbit watch he could probably easily know the amount of steps he took and cals he burned. Alot of people I know have that watch and try to get in a certain amount of steps, and it doesn't seem inherently disordered.


That combined with the calories, weight and obsession - the fact that he thinks about it often and/or severely enough to talk about it publicly, even at the expense of getting weird looks. Plus, all our spidey senses are tingling. Again, disordered eating doesn't necessarily mean eating disorder but it could veey well lead to one, plus a lot of what we would consider "nromal diet culture" is disordered behavior. The more intensity and frequency makes it closer to a disorder. Most people I come across who exhibit disordered behavior, I always want to encourage them to adopt healthy behaviors before it's too late, or gently suggest a more normie option, but I don't always know what to say and/or am too shy. Even if it's not disordered behavior it would still be a nice gesture if I figured out how to do it without being weird.
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#17 Justmyself

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Posted 24 February 2021 - 11:11 AM

That combined with the calories, weight and obsession - the fact that he thinks about it often and/or severely enough to talk about it publicly, even at the expense of getting weird looks. Plus, all our spidey senses are tingling. Again, disordered eating doesn't necessarily mean eating disorder but it could veey well lead to one, plus a lot of what we would consider "nromal diet culture" is disordered behavior. The more intensity and frequency makes it closer to a disorder. Most people I come across who exhibit disordered behavior, I always want to encourage them to adopt healthy behaviors before it's too late, or gently suggest a more normie option, but I don't always know what to say and/or am too shy. Even if it's not disordered behavior it would still be a nice gesture if I figured out how to do it without being weird.

its true disordered eating starts to become an eating disorder i guess when it affects significantly a persons life. For example with me it affects very severely my life, i cannot have a social life or eat out, i cannot have a strong enough body for the activities i want to do, i cannot focus at work since i am fasting during that time because i refuse to eat in public simply because it is a waste of calories. I dont know but was just curious to ask this question because it never honestly happened to me to talk with a person who has the same obsessions about eating weight and exercise as me, if i started talking about my steps and calories i dont know where we would have ended up XD

HW: 60KG. - LW: 48KG. - CW:51KG.

166cm.

GW:50kg.

UGW: 49kg.

 

I used to think of hunger as the pain, before I got to know recovery.


#18 jpi332

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Posted 24 February 2021 - 09:43 PM

That combined with the calories, weight and obsession - the fact that he thinks about it often and/or severely enough to talk about it publicly, even at the expense of getting weird looks. Plus, all our spidey senses are tingling. Again, disordered eating doesn't necessarily mean eating disorder but it could veey well lead to one, plus a lot of what we would consider "nromal diet culture" is disordered behavior. The more intensity and frequency makes it closer to a disorder. Most people I come across who exhibit disordered behavior, I always want to encourage them to adopt healthy behaviors before it's too late, or gently suggest a more normie option, but I don't always know what to say and/or am too shy. Even if it's not disordered behavior it would still be a nice gesture if I figured out how to do it without being weird.

ig it depends. To me, it seems like being aware of that stuff is good as long as it doesn't go into an obsession. What disordered behavior do you usually see? I mean imo it's not inherently disordered to count calories or be aware of exercise and macros, for many its good for health. The reason it's bad and disordered for us is because it's obsessive and we do it even when it's not good for our health and can't stop, and it's not a phase. We don't pick up on a fad diet trend and then leave it after a week or two like normies do, we obsess over it and take it to an extreme.

 

A girl in my class told me today she was on a 5 day or so juice cleanse to detox and wasn't feeling to well, she wasn't at school the past couple of days. Idk if that would be disordered eating since its not with the goal or result of weight loss, and it apparently is a detox thing. So yeah, would that be disordered or just a result of the hippy dippy wellness stuff thats all go vegan and gluten free and juice detoxed? I'm not entirely educated about the science around juice cleanses in the first place, so idk whether they're actually healthy for some people or not.


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#19 I'm a black rainbow

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Posted Yesterday, 09:44 PM

ig it depends. To me, it seems like being aware of that stuff is good as long as it doesn't go into an obsession. What disordered behavior do you usually see? I mean imo it's not inherently disordered to count calories or be aware of exercise and macros, for many its good for health. The reason it's bad and disordered for us is because it's obsessive and we do it even when it's not good for our health and can't stop, and it's not a phase. We don't pick up on a fad diet trend and then leave it after a week or two like normies do, we obsess over it and take it to an extreme.

A girl in my class told me today she was on a 5 day or so juice cleanse to detox and wasn't feeling to well, she wasn't at school the past couple of days. Idk if that would be disordered eating since its not with the goal or result of weight loss, and it apparently is a detox thing. So yeah, would that be disordered or just a result of the hippy dippy wellness stuff thats all go vegan and gluten free and juice detoxed? I'm not entirely educated about the science around juice cleanses in the first place, so idk whether they're actually healthy for some people or not.


Usually what I notice is cutting out whole food groups, like keto (vegetarianism and veganism are usually okay because people still get protien from other things, but like not eating any carbs in my opinion is unhealthy). My dad could be a lot worse, but it makes me nervous how he despises sugar and carbs, he'll say how much he enjoys *thinking* about eating carbs and not actually doing it, and he avoids bread/carbs like the plauge but then drinks more than one or two glasses of wine each night (I really don't count but it does make him slur his speech almost every night), even though alcohol is all carbs.

Also flashback to my ex who basically thought all she needed was vitamins, minerals, and water, but she actually had an eating disorder so I guess that doesn't count

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#20 anoshrekxic

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Posted Yesterday, 09:59 PM

I would say 100% disordered eating, which is unfortunately normalized. My best guess was that he grew up being constantly around disordered people and normalized it in his mind, which explains why he openly talked about his disordered tendencies. I mean he is using exercise to "earn" food, which is not a healthy mind set to say the least. 


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