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It's MAAAAAAAAAY Accountability Check In!


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#61 almostthinlizzy

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Posted 12 May 2021 - 09:07 PM

No change for days it feels like. I posted yesterday or so I thought but it's moot at this point. I had said something abut counting calories and how you get to the point where you just know calorie counts of your safe foods. There is so much I won't eat when ED is thriving like wine and I work at a freaking winery! I'm a level one somm and literally talk wine all day but I don't want the calories so I rarely drink it now. Plus my cardiologist limited my alcohol until he decides to burn the parts that don't work. I miss it but I'd rather get this weight the hell off me. The slow crawl has me very frustrated right now.


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Strength is what I've gained from the madness I've survived.

La conviction, me delivrer du mal.

 

 

 

 

5'2"

HW     188

LW      110 I think (25 years ago)

CW     144143    142  141 140

GW 1  130

GW 2  120

GW 3  110

UGW   100


#62 sweetdaisy

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Posted Yesterday, 07:28 AM

@sweetdaisy, awesome about the race! I envy you your trail running. I would love to get into that, but I know that trail marathons will be harder than road marathons so I get intimidated. My next road marathon is the same day as your ultra btw!


Good luck with your training too. I'm the complete opposite, I find road marathons harder because they are flat and I put too much pressure on myself to keep an even consistent fast pace over 26 miles.

Give me thousands of feet of Elevation and rough terrain any time of the day 😁
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#63 Thaisa

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Posted Yesterday, 08:57 AM

No change for days it feels like. I posted yesterday or so I thought but it's moot at this point. I had said something abut counting calories and how you get to the point where you just know calorie counts of your safe foods. There is so much I won't eat when ED is thriving like wine and I work at a freaking winery! I'm a level one somm and literally talk wine all day but I don't want the calories so I rarely drink it now. Plus my cardiologist limited my alcohol until he decides to burn the parts that don't work. I miss it but I'd rather get this weight the hell off me. The slow crawl has me very frustrated right now.

I feel you on the slow part, but feel good about the fact that at least you are making steady progress. Do you know when about you will reach your goal weight at this pace? Maybe realizing that it will be in the next XX number of months might actually make it easier. (As in, it feels slow but actually you will probably be so much thinner by mid-summer, which will be here in no time.) When I start to get frustrated at lack of progress or slow progress, that is when I nose-dive and say F-it, so best to find small ways to feel good about the progress and ways to celebrate all you have already done. 


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Current weight: 123-126

Height: 5'6"

Ortho athlete

40+

Goal: nutritious eating without purging + to get back to my lean weight of 115 lbs

 


#64 almostthinlizzy

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Posted Yesterday, 11:10 AM

I feel you on the slow part, but feel good about the fact that at least you are making steady progress. Do you know when about you will reach your goal weight at this pace? Maybe realizing that it will be in the next XX number of months might actually make it easier. (As in, it feels slow but actually you will probably be so much thinner by mid-summer, which will be here in no time.) When I start to get frustrated at lack of progress or slow progress, that is when I nose-dive and say F-it, so best to find small ways to feel good about the progress and ways to celebrate all you have already done. 

Thank you Thaisa, reading that really helped. You're right, taking things in smaller bites (no ana pun intended, haha) does make me proud at what progress I have made. I tend to nose dive too but in a spiraling way- like I'll run down the ana rabbit hole and severely restrict which in my current situation would lead to perhaps someone finding out. Therapy was rescheduled this week too so that always makes me feel like I can get away with more. But fuck it, down a pound this morning so I'm going to focus on mid-summer and think about where I'll be by then.


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Strength is what I've gained from the madness I've survived.

La conviction, me delivrer du mal.

 

 

 

 

5'2"

HW     188

LW      110 I think (25 years ago)

CW     144143    142  141 140

GW 1  130

GW 2  120

GW 3  110

UGW   100


#65 branlew

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Posted Yesterday, 01:34 PM

Oh Lord, finally just got a covid shot because Walgreens sent out an email blast saying "it's finally here, bitches!"

Already have a bad headache but hoping I can just shake it off. I work tomorrow but can't call out because I'm on the "final warning" because of an oops I made last month plus I need this money and can't go a day missing pay. Sadly it's the 2 bad managers working tomorrow instead of the good one that has a soul.

Hopefully if I just go to bed real early today it won't be a problem.

Sent from my SM-G930V using Tapatalk
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#66 Thaisa

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Posted Today, 08:39 AM

Still 123. Damn. The weight came on with my period about four days ago and and hasn't left. Frustrating. 

 

Went for a long bike ride yesterday (3 hours). The longest yet of the season so I feel good about that. Breakfast was a protein shake, lunch was salad with hb egg, dinner was an entire rack of spare ribs, but no sides and no sauce. I know I had to be in a deficit yesterday, even with the ribs. I'm trying to feel good about that instead of being frustrated at my stalled weight. Sometimes I think I could survive a famine without losing weight lol. 


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Current weight: 123-126

Height: 5'6"

Ortho athlete

40+

Goal: nutritious eating without purging + to get back to my lean weight of 115 lbs

 


#67 almostthinlizzy

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Posted Today, 11:28 AM

Found out some things yesterday that left me pissed off, hurt and resolved to do whatever it takes moving forward to stay on track, count my calories and hit that UGW. 

 

What's the point of therapy if I'm making a concerted effort to change and those closest to me don't? If I am working to change myself, because you can't change anyone around you, only the way YOU are with them, yet those changes don't garner any results in others around you, what's the fucking point? Anyone have that answer?

 

Down a half pound this morning.


Strength is what I've gained from the madness I've survived.

La conviction, me delivrer du mal.

 

 

 

 

5'2"

HW     188

LW      110 I think (25 years ago)

CW     144143    142  141 140

GW 1  130

GW 2  120

GW 3  110

UGW   100



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