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How thin/fat is your mom? How do you feel about that?


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#1 AvoirFaim

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Posted 20 October 2015 - 07:25 AM

Okay, that second question makes this sound like a therapy session, but I was wondering how many of you feel somewhat competitive with your moms, especially since ED's are genetic and we're a lot more likely than most to have moms with eating issues.

 

My mom is a few inches shorter than me but weighs more than me (though she's not overweight at all) and I get really nervous that she'll get thinner than me or I'll get fatter than her. She lost a lot of weight last year so her current weight is lower than my hw. :/

 

She tries my clothes on sometimes and talks about wanting to fit into my jeans, and that really freaks me out for some reason. I know it's awful, but it would really bother me if we wore the same size.]

 

She's made a few comments that allude to her having some disordered eating when she was younger (purging a few times and wanting to lose weight even though she was already nearly underweight) and she talks a lot about how thin she was when she was young.

 

I hate that I have this competitive side to me. I know I could not have a daughter, at least not while I still have these issues (and given my genetics I don't really want any biological kids at all) because I'm sure I would really mess her up.


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HW: BMI 22.7
CW: ?
LW:  BMI 13.8
GW: ?

(stats are from the "New BMI" calculator)


#2 Rainbow-Dash

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Posted 20 October 2015 - 08:17 AM

My mom is overweight. She's been dieting my entire life and it's what initially triggered my ed. I grew up watching her yoyo diet for years, losing a little and gaining it all back plus more...
I find her body disgusting. Her butt is huge and she's an absolute failure at losing and maintaining weight. I pray to god I never end up like her.
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Stats:


Height:5'5" CW:109lbs HW 190 lbs LW:87lbs GW:98lbs

Daddy's -little- Girl


#3 skinny violet butterfly

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Posted 20 October 2015 - 08:22 AM

Exactly feel the same!
My mom is thin 167 cm 50 kgs
and Im so skinny. Yeah she Is jealous of me. She wanted me to be fatter than her. Pre ED she didn't tell Me that I Was fat but I wasn't blind
I feel really angry cuz she looks like a wannarexic. She eats too little and says Im full! And I feel I wanna die over that time this happens! I stop eating when she does that cause it breaks my heart.



I Only wish I turn 18 soon and get the hell out of her house and Live alone by myself. And live off eating lettuce with
0 calorie drinks without anyone pissing Me off
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#4 Guest_mockviolence_*

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Posted 20 October 2015 - 08:24 AM

My mom has always had a BMI close to or under 17.  She doesn't try to be thin or eat disordered so I guess it's nice to know that genetically it's a good sign for me, but she really doesn't get my issues with food because of it.  She teases me about eating things I said I wasn't going to eat for example, and she knows about my ED.  She just doesn't think it's dangerous and doesn't understand my mental states around food because she's smaller/the same size and normal.


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#5 sarahisrelapsing

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Posted 20 October 2015 - 08:58 AM

There's 3 pounds between me and my mum now, I have lost about a stone of the weight I put on in recovery. I'm trying not to think about it too much. My mum is a massive source of frustration for me when it comes to food/weight, thankfully it's a lot easier to manage since I moved out. I love her though and I don't think she knows she's doing it.


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#6 Ket

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Posted 20 October 2015 - 08:59 AM

Used to be very very thin. Probably as thin as a lot of aneorexics. Back when she was my age she had the perfect body. Now she's definitely chubby despite eating less than me often. It makes me very scared that I will gain weight too

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#7 Fuchsia Again

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Posted 20 October 2015 - 09:13 AM

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My mom's weight is literally none of my business.


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#8 Guest_tinypls_*

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Posted 20 October 2015 - 09:23 AM

My mom is a lot taller than me (5'10") and she is overweight. She doesn't eat many meals, and she is active doing chores around the house every day. What keeps her weight up is constant snacking on junk food. I try to encourage her to eat healthier but she really doesn't care what I say about it lol. My whole family except one of my sisters is overweight, and I think it triggers me to avoid that happening to me too.



#9 DovsDeath

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Posted 20 October 2015 - 09:27 AM

My mom is overweight -_-  She talks about being fat and needing to go on a diet ALL the time. She's nearly caught me once measuring something and asked "Do you need to go to therapy again?" (previously gone for 1 session after a suicide attempt, never took any pills but came close). I was so glad my nephew was there who distracted us away from the topic.


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#10 sesame

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Posted 20 October 2015 - 09:31 AM

My mom is overweight. She crash diets a lot. But she also has a really messed up view of portion sizes. Like two extra large pizzas is a good amount for three people in her mind.

She cooks huge elaborate meals. Like 2-3 trays of fish. Then like 4 sides. And a salad. And expects us to fill up our plate twice or more or else we didn't like the food.

It's a huge trigger for me. My boyfriend eats normally with his family. They have normal portions. When my mom forces me to bring them leftovers, they're always shocked by the amount of food. My boyfriend has learned to eat normally and reacts to my mom's food like it's crazy. But I didn't find it weird until I got sick. Now I'm scared that my mom has programmed gluttony into me. Like the eating habits I was taught as a kid are part of my brain and I will always go back to them. Like no matter how thin my body is, I was raised to be a pig so I will always be a giant fat pig.

So it's sort of competitive. I need to prove to myself that I can eat less than her. I can diet successfully. I can stay skinny etc etc
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#11 secret_dawn

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Posted 20 October 2015 - 09:37 AM

My mom and I are similar in weight now, at least I think, haven't seen her in 4.5 years. From a picture of her on Facebook we look similar. Growing up with her was hard. She has her own body image and self esteem issues and she passed those down to me and took hers out on me. She was always small growing up and worked out like crazy. She always compared my weight at ages to what hers was, I was always heavier...I remember when I went over 100 lbs. "Congratulations, you're now in the triple digits" I was ashamed to eat in front of her. Getting called fat your whole life and being put on a diet in 2nd grade (was in gymnastics and softball so not like I was a slug) sure takes it's toll on you. She's a lovely woman though, just has a few issues she needs to work out.
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#12 wehateeveryone

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Posted 20 October 2015 - 09:40 AM

My mom juggles between 65 and 70 kg at somewhere between 162 and 165 cm. She has the typical 'mom figure'. She overeats at night and that does bother me. I don't want her thin but I don't want her fat either. Idk it's shitty to me watching someone overeat, especially on bad stuff. I guess I just want her to be healthy lol.

 

Her sister however is pretty thin (gonna guess 52 kg or less and same height as my mom). She lives in another country so I rarely see her, but damn she looks so good. I know she does have disordered eating habits (like at our family reunion she ate a plate of fried rice, then told her daughter she wasn't gonna eat for the next few days to even it out).That combined with the knowledge that my mom overeats and that my sister was 'pro ana' in her younger teens and still is kinda weird about body image and shit, makes me think this stuff is genetic to a degree. 

 

edit: I want to add that I feel so weird and uncomfortable with my mom when it's about diets/food. She knows I used to have issues with food and ugh. We've developed this dynamic now where I have to eat crap and never show her I want low sugar/low fat things. I'm hiding stuff like drinking diet soda, cooking fat free, or having Zero Noodles instead of regular noodles. I feel like that shouldn't be something I have to hide, ya know. Like I'm just cutting out unnecessary calories/fat/sugar. Oh well, at least I'm not dealing with the shit some of ya'll have with your moms.


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Posted 20 October 2015 - 09:43 AM

My mom constantly comments on how fat she is- I don't think she is THAT big, a little overweight but nothing crazy. She'll complain about her weight while eating junk food....um, hellooooo?

 

But she also comments on my weight a lot- how I need to eat more, etc. and she 'doesn't understand why I feel the need to exercise'. I try not to talk about food stuff in front of her, because the talks will start coming about how I don't need to worry because I'm beautiful and whatnot.

 

She also said things like that at my HW, however, when I was on the overweight side, so I don't really take what she says seriously.



#14 carolinejjc

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Posted 20 October 2015 - 09:47 AM

My mum is shorter than me but also much skinnier. She has been size 0 my entire life. When she tries to gain, she's losing! She's glad when she gets to wear size 2 which sounds like and absurd to me. But it's all because she had thryoid cancer and she's on meds which makes your metabolism faster as a side effect. It's just super triggering because she eats a ton. She eats like a 1000 calories just for dinner from all the bread and jams and chocolate and I'm sitting there with my green tea like wtf

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#15 Thin_Intention

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Posted 20 October 2015 - 09:49 AM

My mom constantly comments on how fat she is- I don't think she is THAT big, a little overweight but nothing crazy. She'll complain about her weight while eating junk food....um, hellooooo?

But she also comments on my weight a lot- how I need to eat more, etc. and she 'doesn't understand why I feel the need to exercise'. I try not to talk about food stuff in front of her, because the talks will start coming about how I don't need to worry because I'm beautiful and whatnot.

She also said things like that at my HW, however, when I was on the overweight side, so I don't really take what she says seriously.


Oh man my mother is Exactly the same, except she always calls girls with a healthy weight chubby. That makes me feel even worse when I start gaining. ;-;
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#16 notthesamepersonanymore

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Posted 20 October 2015 - 09:52 AM

My mum is slightly overweight, maybe 15 lbs or so. Nothing major. She doesn't have an ED and she's never been huge into dieting or anything, but occasionally she makes comments about her body that are annoying and I wish she'd keep them to herself. When I was younger and extremely underweight, she used to make snarky comments about how she didn't need to eat either if I wasn't going to, which was just ignorant and stupid.

#17 IMissS.P.

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Posted 20 October 2015 - 09:53 AM

My mom was a healthy weight. She wasn't model skinny but nowhere near even slightly fat. But she was the kind of mom that your friends comment on about looking so young and beautiful. I haven't seen her in years but I doubt she's changed much. My mother figure on the other hand is my aunt and she exercises 2h a day for 5 times a week. She's fit but still weighs more than me and is a bit shorter than me so it's never been a challenge with either of them, they never really impacted me for none of them were examples I wanted to follow or was afraid of.
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tumblr_inline_n0vrqbz6iP1rxsw83.giftumblr_inline_n0vrqiTY8e1rxsw83.gif Height - 166cm tumblr_inline_n0vrq3oHeJ1rxsw83.giftumblr_inline_n0vrpyMdVT1rxsw83.gif

tumblr_mc5ulsRRYq1roozkr.giftumblr_mc5ulnbB921roozkr.giftumblr_mc5ulsRRYq1roozkr.gif LW - 37.5kg/CW - 48kg; Back at it again tumblr_mc5ulsRRYq1roozkr.giftumblr_mc5ulnbB921roozkr.giftumblr_mc5ulsRRYq1roozkr.gif

tumblr_inline_n0vrq3oHeJ1rxsw83.giftumblr_inline_n0vrpyMdVT1rxsw83.gif // Never grow up// tumblr_inline_n0vrqbz6iP1rxsw83.giftumblr_inline_n0vrqiTY8e1rxsw83.gif


#18 Guest_Kosmos_*

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Posted 20 October 2015 - 09:56 AM

My mum use to weigh 400 lbs. I use to weigh 300. I put myself on a diet when I was 16 because she didn't want me to lose weight and I lost a ton. She started losing as well, because she noticed how much easier I could move about the house.
Whelp, 5 years later and she weighs waaay less than me. She's got ednos-r and is mega compulsive about every calorie and if she gains and ounce, she has a cow.
I'm sad my mom weighs less than me.
But I'm also sad we can't be like we use to. Nobody in my family enjoys their food anymore. We all eat to live and hate every second of it.

All I want is to be a happy family again and eat and be merry during the holidays.
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#19 Guest_Mockingbird9_*

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Posted 20 October 2015 - 09:57 AM

My mum is kinda overweight, she's fine with that, and she thinks that diets are for stupid people, she absolutely hate the way I eat, and the way I talk about food, she used to be so skinny but then we moved to another country, and she gained weight.
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#20 Guest_MrFatCat_*

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Posted 20 October 2015 - 10:00 AM

My mom is really skinny. She's 5'0 and weighs 100 pounds. You can see her chest bones even. It makes me feel awful about myself
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